Opinion
Protecting Nigerian Children
Parents of past generations would always tell you that parenting is very difficult and challenging, but there is certainly no harder time to be a parent than in this digital age.
With the entire internet at our disposal, it becomes a Herculean task for parents to raise their children the way they desire without negative influence from several quarters.
Many so-called tech experts and writers claim that children need freedom with gadgets, that devices are key to children’s success and that in this digital age, kids learn best through exposure to the latest gadgets. Parents then provide tablets, smartphones and other gadgets for their kids and that becomes a very big problem both in families and the larger society. These kids, through the internet learn all manner of unimaginable things. While some of the male children are addicted to video games, the females are crazy about increasing the number of their social media friends and are ready to do even immoral things to achieve that. The painful thing is that most parents may not have an idea about what their children do on social media.
Watching the mother of the 10-year-old girl of Chrisland School, Lagos, allegedly raped by her school mates agonisingly pleading with Nigerians to help seek justice for her daughter, I could not help but imagine the pains of the family at the present time. For a child to be involved in such a negative story is the last wish of any parent.
But much as one sympathises with the family, after listening and reading the narratives of those who watched the sex tape and many comments, the family’s side of the story seem less convincing. Some say that from the atmosphere in the room, the girl’s expressions and body movement, the act did not appear like a rape and that the girl seemed to be a guru in the act.
It will not be surprising if her parents, especially her mother, had no idea about how wild their kid may have become. Just as they may not be aware that their little daughter is said to have a prominent online presence on the Likee microblogging platform, where she posts all kinds of indecent things and has an encouraging number of followers and viewers. One wonders if at the tender age of ten, this child knows the implication of what she is doing. Upon interrogation, it may just be found out that she probably must have seen people doing it either on the internet or at home and engages in those acts innocently.
Recently a story was told in a women’s group about how a member’s 11-year-old daughter made a pornographic video of herself and was about posting it on the internet when her mother intercepted it. The shocked mother wanted to know what led her to such an act and she said she stumbled upon a porn site when she was using her mother’s phone to do her on-line classes during the peak of Covid-19, and had been watching it whenever she had an opportunity to grab an internet enabled gadget. She apparently did not know the implication of what she was doing. She just wanted to film herself and send online just as the ones she had been watching.
However, parents need to do more. There is a need to teach the kids self-control and how to use technology responsibly. I was impressed to watch an online speaker advising that parents should not buy phones for their children until after their secondary school. That has always been my position. Definitely, they will kick against it and tell you how all their friends and even juniors in school own android phones. But maintain your ground. Make them understand that your decision is in their best interest.
According to a child and adolescent psychologist, Richard Freed, parents can raise more responsible children despite the tech-obsessed culture of this age by applying authoritative parenting, the most effective parenting style, to your kids’ tech use. Authoritative parents, in his view, are loving and highly engaged in children’s lives, and they provide high expectations and limits to support those expectations.
He further admonished, “to be loving and engaged with our children, it is best if parents and kids have lots of time away from devices to be fully present with one another. And to provide kids high expectations and limits, parents should not try to be their children’s friend, but rather understand that they have the responsibility to set tech limits (even when kids push back) to foster distraction-free family moments, reading, and study time.
“Consider employing the rule used by many leading tech executives that children and teens do not use screens and phones in their bedrooms. This encourages kids to spend time in shared family spaces and also increases the odds that they will use computers and other devices productively.”
Indeed, parents need to create more time for their children, try as much as possible to monitor their activities, set limits and most importantly, be a good role model. A lot of parents, by their lifestyle, are leading their children astray. A lot of parents know that their children have behavioural problems, they protect them from such deviant problems and do not want schools to sanction them.
Some schools on the other hand, particularly private schools are not willing to punish some badly behaved students because they are children or relations of some highly influencial people in the country or they are afraid of losing their parents’ or guardians’ patronage. So, they go on covering their ills and these children go on being terrors unto their fellow students.
The same attitude of covering up wrong doings could be seen in the Chrisland Schools management’s handling of the sex scandal. According to the mother of the girl involved in the scandal, the school authorities concealed the matter for over one month, did not tell either her or her husband what happened, conducted pregnancy tests on her daughter without their consent and even warned her never to tell her mum what had happened in Dubai.
The school on the other hand claimed that futile efforts were made to inform the parents about the incident. They eventually expelled the girl indefinitely while the male students that took part in the improper behaviour were suspended. But for social media, the school might have succeeded in hushing up the case.
What many people still find difficult to understand is how a school could take these little children to a foreign land and leave them unpoliced. Where were the adults that travelled with these kids the whole period the “Truth or Dare” game that culminated in the improper behaviour took place? Were the boys and girls meant to be together? If not, how did the girl find her way into the room where the act took place?
One just hopes the Lagos Police Command, the Lagos State Government and other authorities involved in investigating the matter will do a thorough job, get to the root of it and whoever displayed any act of negligence in the case, duly punished.
We must begin to enforce the available laws and punish people who are negligent in the duty of taking care of our children – the minders, administrators, teachers, caregivers and others. Our children need to be adequately protected.
These incidents are becoming one too many – the Sylvester Oromoni of Dowen College, Lekki, Lagos State, Karen-Happuch Akpagher of Premiere Academy, Lugbe, Abuja, etc.- and they keep happening because the culprits are hardly punished. Each time these cases happened, a panel would be set up to investigate it and hardly do governments implement the recommendations of those panels. This Chrisland’s case should be different.
By: Calista Ezeaku
Opinion
Wike VS Soldier’s Altercation: Matters Arising
The events that unfolded in Abuja on Tuesday November 11, 2025 between the Minister of the Federal Capital Territory, Chief Nyesom Wike and a detachment of soldiers guarding a disputed property, led by Adams Yerima, a commissioned Naval Officer, may go down as one of the defining images of Nigeria’s democratic contradictions. It was not merely a quarrel over land. It was a confrontation between civil authority and the military legacy that still hovers over our national life.
Nyesom Wike, fiery and fearless as always, was seen on video exchanging words with a uniformed officer who refused to grant him passage to inspect a parcel of land alleged to have been illegally acquired. The minister’s voice rose, his temper flared, and the soldier, too, stood his ground, insisting on his own authority. Around them, aides, security men, and bystanders watched, stunned, as two embodiments of the Nigerian state clashed in the open.
The images spread fast, igniting debates across drawing rooms, beer parlours, and social media platforms. Some hailed Wike for standing up to military arrogance; others scolded him for perceived disrespect to the armed forces. Yet beneath the noise lies a deeper question about what sort of society we are building and whether power in Nigeria truly understands the limits of its own reach.
It is tragic that, more than two decades into civil rule, the relationship between the civilian arm of government and the military remains fragile and poorly understood. The presence of soldiers in a land dispute between private individuals and the city administration is, by all civic standards, an aberration. It recalls a dark era when might was right, and uniforms conferred immunity against accountability.
Wike’s anger, even if fiery, was rooted in a legitimate concern: that no individual, however connected or retired, should deploy the military to protect personal interests. That sentiment echoes the fundamental democratic creed that the law is supreme, not personalities. If his passion overshot decorum, it was perhaps a reflection of a nation weary of impunity.
On the other hand, the soldier in question is a symbol of another truth: that discipline, respect for order, and duty to hierarchy are ingrained in our armed forces. He may have been caught between conflicting instructions one from his superiors, another from a civilian minister exercising his lawful authority. The confusion points not to personal failure but to institutional dysfunction.
It is, therefore, simplistic to turn the incident into a morality play of good versus evil.
*********”**** What happened was an institutional embarrassment. Both men represented facets of the same failing system a polity still learning how to reconcile authority with civility, law with loyalty, and service with restraint.
In fairness, Wike has shown himself as a man of uncommon courage. Whether in Rivers State or at the FCTA, he does not shy away from confrontation. Yet courage without composure often feeds misunderstanding. A public officer must always be the cooler head, even when provoked, because the power of example outweighs the satisfaction of winning an argument.
Conversely, soldiers, too, must be reminded that their uniforms do not place them above civilian oversight. The military exists to defend the nation, not to enforce property claims or intimidate lawful authorities. Their participation in purely civil matters corrodes the image of the institution and erodes public trust.
One cannot overlook the irony: in a country where kidnappers roam highways and bandits sack villages, armed men are posted to guard contested land in the capital. It reflects misplaced priorities and distorted values. The Nigerian soldier, trained to defend sovereignty, should not be drawn into private or bureaucratic tussles.
Sycophancy remains the greatest ailment of our political culture. Many of those who now cheer one side or the other do so not out of conviction but out of convenience. Tomorrow they will switch allegiance. True patriotism lies not in defending personalities but in defending principles. A people enslaved by flattery cannot nurture a culture of justice.
The Nigerian elite must learn to submit to the same laws that govern the poor. When big men fence off public land and use connections to shield their interests, they mock the very constitution they swore to uphold. The FCT, as the mirror of national order, must not become a jungle where only the powerful can build.
The lesson for Wike himself is also clear: power is best exercised with calmness. The weight of his office demands more than bravery; it demands statesmanship. To lead is not merely to command, but to persuade — even those who resist your authority.
Equally, the lesson for the armed forces is that professionalism shines brightest in restraint. Obedience to illegal orders is not loyalty; it is complicity. The soldier who stands on the side of justice protects both his honour and the dignity of his uniform.
The Presidency, too, must see this episode as a wake-up call to clarify institutional boundaries. If soldiers can be drawn into civil enforcement without authorization, then our democracy remains at risk of subtle militarization. The constitution must speak louder than confusion.
The Nigerian public deserves better than spectacles of ego. We crave leaders who rise above emotion and officers who respect civilian supremacy. Our children must not inherit a nation where authority means shouting matches and intimidation in public glare.
Every democracy matures through such tests. What matters is whether we learn the right lessons. The British once had generals who defied parliament; the Americans once fought over states’ rights; Nigeria, too, must pass through her own growing pains but with humility, not hubris.
If the confrontation has stirred discomfort, then perhaps it has done the nation some good. It forces a conversation long overdue: Who truly owns the state — the citizen or the powerful? Can we build a Nigeria where institutions, not individuals, define our destiny?
As the dust settles, both the FCTA and the military hierarchy must conduct impartial investigations. The truth must be established — not to shame anyone, but to restore order. Where laws were broken, consequences must follow. Where misunderstandings occurred, apologies must be offered.
Let the rule of law triumph over the rule of impulse. Let civility triumph over confrontation. Let governance return to the path of dialogue and procedure.
Nigeria cannot continue to oscillate between civilian bravado and military arrogance. Both impulses spring from the same insecurity — the fear of losing control. True leadership lies in the ability to trust institutions to do their work without coercion.
Those who witnessed the clash saw a drama of two gladiators. One in starched khaki, one in well-cut suit. Both proud, both unyielding. But a nation cannot be built on stubbornness; it must be built on understanding. Power, when it meets power, should produce order, not chaos.
We must resist the temptation to glorify temper. Governance is not warfare; it is stewardship. The citizen watches, the world observes, and history records. How we handle moments like this will define our collective maturity.
The confrontation may have ended without violence, but it left deep questions in the national conscience. When men of authority quarrel in the open, institutions tremble. The people, once again, become spectators in a theatre of misplaced pride.
It is time for all who hold office — civilian or military — to remember that they serve under the same flag. That flag is neither khaki nor political colour; it is green-white-green, and it demands humility.
No victor, no vanquish only a lesson for a nation still learning to govern itself with dignity.
By; King Onunwor
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