When you talk about preparation of food in the homes and eateries, women are more engaged. Women are the ones whose expertise is needed because that is their work.
Lately, the issue of adulterated loi loi went viral with speculations that it was prepared with detergents and other substances to enable it ferment faster.
But can that be true? Women, especially should be able to identify good fufu consumption and sold in the market or in shops.
The truth is that every product has its expiry date. It is not factory produced but locally, producers in the rural areas know when and how long a particular produce should last.
I equally know that there are certain specie of cassava that do not last for long so should be consumed as quickly as possible.
Storing fufu in a refrigerator may not even be the best, sometimes, their expiration may be noticed through the smell after several days of prodction.
Production of loi loi is not peculiar with one ethnic group. Many regions produce cassava to prepare garri and fufu.
Fufu, loi loi, akpu as you may call it is got from cassava. Cassava is normally uprooted from it iss stem planted in farms. There are other food items that can be gotten from cassava. They are garri when it is fried and tapioca “nkpuru jakwu”. Some call it “abacha.” We also have cassava cake “akra jakwu” which is fried with palm oil.
Actually, loi loi or fufu is not produced by Etche people alone. It can be found in many villages and towns of Nigeria especially where cassava planting is practised.
In Rivers State, majority of the upland towns and  villages like the Ikwerres, Ogonis, Ogbas, Ahoadas and others that cannot be mentioned here who practise agriculture also produce cassava, which is for preparation of  loi loi.
When we were younger in the village, there were mainly two ways of preparing fufu. After uprooting cassava from the farm, you send it into the river (flowing stream) where a space was created while using something remarkable, like a stick to indicate the position where you were depositing it.
Another way was putting cassava inside a bag well tied so as to prevent the tubers from scattering inside the river. The bag was tied to a stick so that it would not flow with water.  This method also helps to distinguish one person’s own from another. It was really a means of easy identification.  This was the original way of soaking cassava that can be used to prepare fufu.
For those parts of Etche communities and other towns which never had rivers (streams), they used to put cassava tubers into containers, may be plastic or pots to be allowed for days to ferment. Whether cassava is deposited into the (rivers) flowing streams or they are soaked in containers at home, they are supposed to be kept for at least, a couple of five (5) to seven (7) days for fermentation to take place.
At the end of those number of days, you are expected to go to the river to wash and filter into a bag with small metal-made sieve “ekete” to enable you remove the chaffs.
With the help of bag, dropped on the dry space off the stream, water will drip little by little until it becomes a little solid before taking it home.
The same method applies to the ones kept at home.
These recent speculations that women use detergents for cassava to ferment faster call for concern and should be looked into.
For cassava that was soaked at home in containers, no detergent was used to soften it. It would rather get dissolved on its own. Even these days that some rivers have gone dry, majority of Etche women soak cassava in containers without the use of detergents. You could also put it at home. They prepare them naturally. I have never seen anywhere in Etche or other parts where detergent was used to ease fermentation of cassava and where that is practised.
When I interviewed, a farmer from Kpite, Tai, Mrs Lebari Christian, about the use of detergent in soaking fufu, she said she had no idea about it.
She said naturally, cassava that is soaked for five to seven days should get soft on its own.
Another farmer from Ipo in Ikwerre Local Government Area, Mrs. Nkesi Woha, said sometimes, they grind cassava after soaking for two days because of the specie.
According to her, some cassava need to be ground so as to ferment easily due to the specie. Then, it would be soaked for another two days for fermentation. But even then, that does not mean that detergent or any other substance is applied in that regard.
I also discovered that some grind cassava before soaking it to get soft within some days. I understand that certain specie of cassava do not get soft easily, hence, the idea of grinding after being soaked for two days.
Before now, there was a way of cooking loi loi or fufu without turning it in a frying pot. One way of doing that was: you get a required quantity of your fresh prepared (filtered) cassava ready in a bowl.
You cut into your palms and mould into desired sizes. Put the moulded sizes into a boiling water in a pot and allow to boil for 20 to 30 minutes. Use spoon to remove into a morter and use pestle to do justice to it. After pounding till it gets soft, you mould again and return it into the boiling water, the initial water and allow to boil for about 15 minutes as the case may be.
Bring it out into the morter the second time and pound till it becomes smooth for swallow. One interesting fact is that, you can add little water while pounding to make it soft. You can cut with your hand or knife to serve.
With that system, every Etche household or other tribes who prepare and consume fufu had and still have at least one moderate sized morter and pestle for pounding fufu.
There is something noticeable in that regard, the water used in cooking the fufu is normally whitish. As if certain substance is allowed to boil and removed from the cassava.
There is another method of cooking or preparing loi loi or fufu. This is a method where you place a frying pot on fire. Add water and allow the water to boil. Add the wet cassava little by little and continue to turn till it is cooked. In this method, nothing is removed like substance from the cassava. Sometimes the women rub palm oil in the frying pot to avoid loi loi sticking to the pot. While you consume fufu, you may find out that some contain little palm oil.
The difference between this method and earlier one is that, in the earlier one, whitish substance is removed as it is cooked before pounding.
The uniqueness of pounded loi loi and the “turning” in the pot is clear.  That of pounding lasts longer than the turning.
Before now, after pounding fufu using the morter and pestle, you can use your hand to cut or a kitchen knife to cut to sizes.
Those days, loi loi or fufu was not tied with nylon. I think the idea of tying or packaging with nylon, now adays to make it portable for easy distribution.
All the loi loi consumed in the city come from different parts of the country with different ways of preparation so that one ethnic region should not be blamed for disaffection.
I discovered in a city outside Port Harcourt where raw fermented cassava loaded in bags was displayed in front of several shops.  Those ones would have been there for a week or more.  The women were preparing hot fufu from it publicly while people were patronising.
Some of them last for weeks. Definitely, they will start developing smelling odour. Since it is not factory produced, it should last for a few days.
Fufu should not also be eaten cold, women as a matter of fact, should ensure that fufu is warmed before serving.  Eateries should also take note.
Fufu, like garri comes into Port Harcourt from other nearby States. There are designated points where distributors offload the ones that are not produced in Rivers State.
Market women or consumers of fufu should be able to identify well prepared one at sight.
You can have a feeling of it before buying.
With good  loi loi from any part of Rivers State, particularly,  you can serve with soup or pepper soup.

Eunice Choko-Kayode

Marriage is a fabric of the society. In Christendom, marriage is designed for two people. It is a journey of life for husband and wife. Marriage as seen these days as almost on attack. It is common to see that couples go into marriage and in not less than six months, that marriage is threatened. Little issues that should not cause problems arise. Sometimes you may be surprised to hear what causes the problems. Unfortunately, couples do not say the truth when issues are made public.
Different people have different opinions when conflicts occur in marriage. Some argue that women should be the custodian of love in marriage. There are women who cannot exercise patience in things that concern husband and wife. When they are undergoing challenges, they are asked to remain, especially those who have children. There are those who may not continue in marriage even when they have a hundred kids in a home. The number of children a woman has may not stop her from ending a marriage if she is not comfortable.
A believer’s trust in God will make her succeed in marriage. There is a relationship between marriage and the scripture. In marriage, you do not allow your partner to work alone. It is for companionship before children start arriving.
A woman may ask herself if companionship in marriage is what it should be. There should be words of encouragement when things are not normal.
Before going into marriage, women should develop the capacity to cope. It is not that you may not have other friends, but your partner needs your cooperation and understanding to make it work. Be a good partner and ensure a balance between the two of you.
Women should avoid selfish motives in marriage. It is a fact that marriage challenges are so much, but women should do things without expecting credit. One may ask: “What will I gain from marriage?”. Of course the benefits are enormous. If marriage does not work for one, it does not mean that it will not work for another. Things concerning marriage are seen in different perspective by different people.
There must be good communication between a husband and wife, effective communication indeed. Communication is learnt and it is effective when your meaning equates that of your spouse. Communication is a skill. Couples must learn how to communicate, not by shouting when communicating. A woman should not shout her spouse down during discussions. Communication enforces bonding. Communication is a live wire of marriage. The bond of marriage should be strengthened so that marriages can last longer. Words are powerful. Words are spirit in the life of your spouse. Listening strengthens marriage. Actions must align with what you say, when and how you say it. The way you say it must be understood.
A woman should put herself in the shoe of her spouse. Showing empathy to your spouse will go a long way in strengthening your marriage.
When you talk about love in marriage, there are many skills. Listening takes patience. It is a skill that needs patience. It is good to listen for several hours for your spouse to empty his heart.
In marriage, offence will definitely come especially when the marriage is new. There must be differences because husband and wife are coming from different backgrounds. Limited understanding can cause conflicts in marriage so giving way to one person can help in marriage. No offence should remain permanent. Women can overcome challenges and do not let conflict tear your marriage apart.
Interestingly, experts in marital affairs have come with tools that can make marriage work. Such tools are shared resources.
Truly, for women to be steadfast in marriage, there is a lot to do. Creating a community where you share wisdom is necessary, a healthy community, indeed. No matter how smart a woman may be, there are things she may be ignorant of.
Most importantly, it is wrong for a woman to discipline a child in her care by putting pepper or painful substances into a child’s private part. Some women also have the habit of tearing a girl’s dress, especially foster child in the public due to one provocation or the other.
Community activity is important for a woman to excel in marriage. Bathing together by couples will strengthen their marriage. Although some wives may not like it. It may shock you to know that some couples bathed together only when they got married newly. A woman who was interviewed by her counsellor when she encountered a problem in her marriage concerning bathing together, replied that it was only when they got married newly. That was after about 15 years.
Marriage requires much to keep it moving from one level to another. Other activities involve commitment, hard work and diligence just to mention but a few.
Attending professional marital seminars can help solve some problems. It is good to locate community, positive ones where couples learn and share ideas, express their problems and challenges and seek solutions and remedies.
Norms, experiences, values and others are the factors responsible for marital sweetness and uniqueness.
Marriage is like a template. What you log in is what you get. No two marriages are the same and there is no comparison in marriage. The principles in marriage work provided you apply them well. The principles must be backed up with examples.
The principles of friendship in marriage work depending on how you apply them. An application that worked in your marriage may not work in another’s marriage. It is wrong to copy what may not work for you.
The principles also work with time. Creating quality time together can help make a unique marriage.
Years back, only men worked to fend for the family while the women stayed at home to nurture children and do other house chores. Nowadays, the woman too work or engage in other businesses as the men may not be able to handle upkeeps alone. You discover that their schedules are very tight that they don’t have quality time for themselves.
Some persons are addicted to their devices that they may not have enough time for their spouses. For marriage to be sweet, partners must create quality time for themselves. Family time should be created to include the children. As couples continue to be engaged in jobs and day to day businesses, they must create time. For you to have a unique marriage, a neutral time should be created for couples to interact. There are women who feel that quality time with their spouses depend on the expenditure involved. They prefer a situation where their spouses take them outside home for relaxation.
Culture is another problem affecting uniqueness of marriage. There are men who prefer to spend time with friends and kinsmen instead of spending such time with their wives. They see the woman as one whose time should be spent only in the kitchen. In some people’s culture, women can never stay where men gather and discuss.
For women to build marital sweetness, building resilience in relationship is key as well as romantic adventure. Women need to build very strong resilience to be in marriage. Resilience is the capacity to withstand challenges and unforeseen circumstances.
Many marriages are doing well on their own but challenges like sickness, poverty, lack of children (infertility), infidelity, etc, go a long way to destroy them. A lot of relationships standing today have undergone many problems for marital sweetness to be achieved. It is not a bed of roses.
Marriages nowadays have chances of disintegrating but some couples are able to make up. Resilience builds strong marriage. Standard of living, family upkeep, intimacy and finance to buy things in the home affect marriage.
Marriage undergoes phases. There are times when couples abuse themselves but being a resilient partner can help your marriage survive. Consistently make up your mind that your marriage will succeed.
As a woman, getting pregnant and taking delivery of a baby at the ninth month, nursing and nurturing such baby take a lot of challenges, so also is marriage.
If you can determine that your business must grow with resilience, then, your marriage can also grow.
Little talks from wives normally make their spouses take some decisions in marital affairs. Let us assume that your spouse returns late from work or business with a troubled mind, you should be able to encourage him or her.
Gratitude to partners and appreciating each other’s efforts in little things at home help in building marital sweetness.
Building problem-solving skills help you maintain resilience in marriage.
Identify what the problem is. Do not deal with the symptoms. Take series of questions. For you to be resilient, you must know how to solve problems. If you are not a good problems-solver, you may be creating a problem. Be patient because all problems cannot be solved in a day.
A woman may take a break without violence and as you leave the house, you don’t bang the door.
Being a problem solver, you should be able to manage your mental health. Mental stability is very important in marriage.
Avoid being an unteachable spouse. A woman should learn from experts in marital seminars and workshop.
All hands must be on deck to ensure that couples keep to marital vows.
Your marriage like a house should be built in such a way that when flood comes, it is not washed away.

Eunice Choko-Kayode