In Oxford Learners’ Dictio
nary, divorce’ is defined as the legal ending of a marriage.
The ending of a relationship between two things or a separation.  Remarriage is to marry again after being divorced or after one’s husband or wife has died.  The philosophy of the biblical missing rib cannot be over-emphasised as long as marital relationship thrives.  The marriage institution in the garden of Eden brings to bear that God has answers to every human problem.
The origin of marriage is traced back to Eden where God officiated and appended his signature to the indispensable, indissoluble and memorable union.  God saw the need of man, even when not intimated to him and discovered that it was not good that the man (Adam) should be alone.  Frankly, any teaching against marriage is the doctrine of the devil because it seeks to inflict moral flaws of lying in God.  There is a necessity for marriage (Genesis 2:20) as it is a relationship between husband and wife.  Marriage is the life contract made by a man and woman to live as husband and wife.
The Bible says “that he which made them at the beginning made them male and female. For this cause shall a man leave father and mother and shall cleave to his wife and they twain shall be one flesh, wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh.  What therefore God hath joined together, let no man put asunder” (Matthew 19:3-6).
The Lord carefully explained that marriage is no prerequisite to the kingdom of God.  Maturity and education of the system are paramount before assuming and actualizing the status.
Marriage is life partnership, therefore, marriageable partners must pray for God’s will in their lives.  Physical beauty has little contribution to the stability of the union.
True Christian uphold that “no divorce, no remarriage until death”.
Reverend Dakes stated seven reasons why marriage is indissoluble:- (1) Marriage is a divine institution.
(2) It is an express commandment
(3) It is an example of Adam and Eve (4) Because marriage makes a man and woman one flesh, with complete union of interest, fortunes, desires, joys, sorrows and a life-long partnership (5) Because of the evil consequences on divorce to themselves, the children and others who become entangled in sin by it.
(6) Because of the penalties involved by causing such evils (7) Because there is no excuse under the gospel for “hardness of hearts against each other”.
Divorce and remarriage are devilish.  This is why Jesus Christ warned that “what God has joined together let no man put asunder”.
Any man who puts asunder has ruined his eternal destiny with God.  God’s plan for marriage is oneness and togetherness until death. He made no provision for divorce and remarriage.  Child upbringing is the absolute responsibility of the husband and wife, so with the exit of one partner single parents are incapacitated to vigorously carry out their duties.
Husband and wife must learn how to love, forgive and tolerate each other because there are no greener pastures. A husband must see his wife as the best woman and vice versa.   Both of them must learn the art of love and maintain the sanctity.  Marriage should not be entered into hurriedly but through prayers for compatibility.  Married couples should endeavour to practice forgiveness and temperance in their relationship as Christians.  Spouses should be able to declare their stand to their parents and in-laws.  This is necessary because of their overriding influence in the African home but it must note that third parties are not wanted if the marriage must thrive until death.  Some parents and in-laws are “marriage killers”, but a wise man must stand on his toes to ensure its continuity.
One of the deadly diseases militating against marriage vows today is suspicion.  Happiness and joy can never exist between spouses who suspect one other because what exists prominently in their midst is fear, destructive criticisms, squabble, mistrust and divorce.
As marriage is a life-time contract, partners must love one another to avoid the evils of suspicion, which must not be seen, heard or entertained in a Christian home.  Suspicion impedes the progress of any marriage just as there may be accusations.  So, couples should be careful and fight their common enemy, Satan.  They should not see themselves as enemies and they must maintain their marital vows no matter the cost to encourage new intakes into holy matrimony.
Marriage is ordained by God to be enjoyed and not endured. However, there are few exemptions in divorce and re-marriage outside death, based on cultural and religious values.
Nigerian culture approves payment of bride price either in court or traditional setting and consequently the church upholds this value as a vehicle for sanity.   God in His holiness does not permit separation or divorce of the legally bound spouses, so also, the church.  People should never allow               the question of divorce and remarriage to occupy their heart any day as wives are legally bound with their own husbands as long as they live until death.  Marriage is irrevocable relationship compared to Christ and His Church in all things.
There are factors that have legalized divorce and remarriage in a secular society and they should not be transferred to the church at all.
According to the book of Matthew 19:9, and I say unto you, whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication and shall marry another committed adultery and whosoever married her which is put away doeth commit adultery”.  This is a direct statement of Jesus permitting divorce on the ground of fornication alone, that is, unfaithfulness or illicit sexual relationship with a third party.
What the scriptures mean is that any partner so divorced must remain unmarried.
Divorce is a disgrace and a public admission of utter failure.  It has bad consequences in that the welfare of the children must be adversely affected, ruins love and happiness, brings sorrow and shame as well as loneliness.  Days are gone when remarriage and divorce were based on certain factors as childlessness, permanent ill-health, search of male children, incompatibility, drunkenness, conviction of crime neglect to provide and so on.  One major problem of divorce today could be traced to our insatiable lust and partners voluntarily build bridges to facilitate demonic invasions in the marriage, which end product may be fault-finding, witch-hunting, hatred, separation and divorce.  Married couples are advised to uphold their partners as God’s model companion for them and enjoy a lasting marriage relationship originally intended by God at Eden.

Shedie Okpara

Representative of the Inspector General of Police, CP. Wilson Inalegwu (middle), representative of National President, Police Officers Wives Association, Mrs Esther Etim (3rd right) and the representative of Defence and Police Officers Wives Association, Mrs Veronica Iwodi and other participants, at the sensitisation workshop on Sexual and Gender-based Violence in Abuja, yesterday.