Opinion
Between Motherhood And Career
I have been engaged in many arguments about feminism, a women agitation for equal treatment, but I had never been so altruistic and passionate about it until last week, when my female neighbour, Chidinma elevated the discussion to somewhat an academic level.
She started with the popular saying among womenfolk that ‘what a man can do, a woman can do even better.’ She argued that even though men would always contest this mantra, events around the world are beginning to clothe it with the garb of truth.
In spite of my strong conviction that it was wrong for women to abandon their traditional role of motherhood for mannish jobs, I was made to realise that the socio-economic realities of the 21st century and the churlish, chest-beating bravado of men have made it compellingly imperative for women to rise to high heavens.
Chidinma was right. In a climate that is dominated by men, male chauvinism always carries a tinge of masculinity, and even sometimes resonates in chest-beating machoism. It was as a result of this machoism that women took the fight for equality with men to Beijing, China in 1995. Even though their dream is still far from being realised, the Beijing conference, we must admit, was a pathos that gave women the right pep and encouragement needed to confront the tough world of win-win male chauvinism.
In developing countries like Nigeria where socio-economic climate is dominated by men and where middle class has become a more impregnable fortress, one can hardly blame women for their restlessness to be at par with their men counterparts.
A journalist, Barbara Ehrenreich recalled sometimes ago that in the good olden days, only men had to scale the impenetrable walls of professional middle class, with only fewer women drifting in on the strength of their mental abilities.
Today, the situation has changed. Virtually all women are career-minded. There is hardly any profession or career that is beyond the reach of women. We now have female engineers, astronomers, gynaecologists, computer wizards, pilots, footballers, presidents and female professionals in every other human endeavour. These professions were once the prerogatives of men alone.
This feminine mystigue is further exacerbated by the surely, proud attitude of men who are now interested in finding a partner who would not be a burden, but rather someone who could pull her own weight, as if they were selecting a companion for upstream rafting trip.
As psychologist and men’s liberalism advocate, Herb Goldbers argued in the 1970s, if women were tired of being ‘sex objects’ for men, men were equally tired of being ‘success objects’ for women. In other words, a pairing based on economics is now occurring, with higher income men and higher income women tending to find each other.
With this projection, the question that will readily agitate many minds is, what becomes of the traditional role of women which is primarily child-bearing and child-care?
Good question one might say. But in a country like Nigeria where it is almost impossible for a man to solely shoulder the family responsibilities and where both sexes are looking for proven wage earners as partners, women may be left with no better option than to be career-minded.
One might also ask why women do not take up jobs that require less of their time so that they can pay adequate attention to their home-fronts. Again, the answer goes thus: In a country where civil service job that requires less time is as scarce as American Dollar, and where the monthly take-home can not take an average middle level manager home, resisting or quitting a time-consuming but well paid job may be a difficult option for women.
In this case, what should a woman with good, but time-consuming job do? Should she abandon her job and add to her husband’s misery? Or should she stay on the job at the expense of her home?
The question, I must say, stares us in the face and reverberates back to the state of our economy, in which case the womenfolk is left with no better option than to strike a balance between motherhood and career. How they intend to achieve this remains a one million naira question.
Boye Salau
Opinion
Wike VS Soldier’s Altercation: Matters Arising
The events that unfolded in Abuja on Tuesday November 11, 2025 between the Minister of the Federal Capital Territory, Chief Nyesom Wike and a detachment of soldiers guarding a disputed property, led by Adams Yerima, a commissioned Naval Officer, may go down as one of the defining images of Nigeria’s democratic contradictions. It was not merely a quarrel over land. It was a confrontation between civil authority and the military legacy that still hovers over our national life.
Nyesom Wike, fiery and fearless as always, was seen on video exchanging words with a uniformed officer who refused to grant him passage to inspect a parcel of land alleged to have been illegally acquired. The minister’s voice rose, his temper flared, and the soldier, too, stood his ground, insisting on his own authority. Around them, aides, security men, and bystanders watched, stunned, as two embodiments of the Nigerian state clashed in the open.
The images spread fast, igniting debates across drawing rooms, beer parlours, and social media platforms. Some hailed Wike for standing up to military arrogance; others scolded him for perceived disrespect to the armed forces. Yet beneath the noise lies a deeper question about what sort of society we are building and whether power in Nigeria truly understands the limits of its own reach.
It is tragic that, more than two decades into civil rule, the relationship between the civilian arm of government and the military remains fragile and poorly understood. The presence of soldiers in a land dispute between private individuals and the city administration is, by all civic standards, an aberration. It recalls a dark era when might was right, and uniforms conferred immunity against accountability.
Wike’s anger, even if fiery, was rooted in a legitimate concern: that no individual, however connected or retired, should deploy the military to protect personal interests. That sentiment echoes the fundamental democratic creed that the law is supreme, not personalities. If his passion overshot decorum, it was perhaps a reflection of a nation weary of impunity.
On the other hand, the soldier in question is a symbol of another truth: that discipline, respect for order, and duty to hierarchy are ingrained in our armed forces. He may have been caught between conflicting instructions one from his superiors, another from a civilian minister exercising his lawful authority. The confusion points not to personal failure but to institutional dysfunction.
It is, therefore, simplistic to turn the incident into a morality play of good versus evil.
*********”**** What happened was an institutional embarrassment. Both men represented facets of the same failing system a polity still learning how to reconcile authority with civility, law with loyalty, and service with restraint.
In fairness, Wike has shown himself as a man of uncommon courage. Whether in Rivers State or at the FCTA, he does not shy away from confrontation. Yet courage without composure often feeds misunderstanding. A public officer must always be the cooler head, even when provoked, because the power of example outweighs the satisfaction of winning an argument.
Conversely, soldiers, too, must be reminded that their uniforms do not place them above civilian oversight. The military exists to defend the nation, not to enforce property claims or intimidate lawful authorities. Their participation in purely civil matters corrodes the image of the institution and erodes public trust.
One cannot overlook the irony: in a country where kidnappers roam highways and bandits sack villages, armed men are posted to guard contested land in the capital. It reflects misplaced priorities and distorted values. The Nigerian soldier, trained to defend sovereignty, should not be drawn into private or bureaucratic tussles.
Sycophancy remains the greatest ailment of our political culture. Many of those who now cheer one side or the other do so not out of conviction but out of convenience. Tomorrow they will switch allegiance. True patriotism lies not in defending personalities but in defending principles. A people enslaved by flattery cannot nurture a culture of justice.
The Nigerian elite must learn to submit to the same laws that govern the poor. When big men fence off public land and use connections to shield their interests, they mock the very constitution they swore to uphold. The FCT, as the mirror of national order, must not become a jungle where only the powerful can build.
The lesson for Wike himself is also clear: power is best exercised with calmness. The weight of his office demands more than bravery; it demands statesmanship. To lead is not merely to command, but to persuade — even those who resist your authority.
Equally, the lesson for the armed forces is that professionalism shines brightest in restraint. Obedience to illegal orders is not loyalty; it is complicity. The soldier who stands on the side of justice protects both his honour and the dignity of his uniform.
The Presidency, too, must see this episode as a wake-up call to clarify institutional boundaries. If soldiers can be drawn into civil enforcement without authorization, then our democracy remains at risk of subtle militarization. The constitution must speak louder than confusion.
The Nigerian public deserves better than spectacles of ego. We crave leaders who rise above emotion and officers who respect civilian supremacy. Our children must not inherit a nation where authority means shouting matches and intimidation in public glare.
Every democracy matures through such tests. What matters is whether we learn the right lessons. The British once had generals who defied parliament; the Americans once fought over states’ rights; Nigeria, too, must pass through her own growing pains but with humility, not hubris.
If the confrontation has stirred discomfort, then perhaps it has done the nation some good. It forces a conversation long overdue: Who truly owns the state — the citizen or the powerful? Can we build a Nigeria where institutions, not individuals, define our destiny?
As the dust settles, both the FCTA and the military hierarchy must conduct impartial investigations. The truth must be established — not to shame anyone, but to restore order. Where laws were broken, consequences must follow. Where misunderstandings occurred, apologies must be offered.
Let the rule of law triumph over the rule of impulse. Let civility triumph over confrontation. Let governance return to the path of dialogue and procedure.
Nigeria cannot continue to oscillate between civilian bravado and military arrogance. Both impulses spring from the same insecurity — the fear of losing control. True leadership lies in the ability to trust institutions to do their work without coercion.
Those who witnessed the clash saw a drama of two gladiators. One in starched khaki, one in well-cut suit. Both proud, both unyielding. But a nation cannot be built on stubbornness; it must be built on understanding. Power, when it meets power, should produce order, not chaos.
We must resist the temptation to glorify temper. Governance is not warfare; it is stewardship. The citizen watches, the world observes, and history records. How we handle moments like this will define our collective maturity.
The confrontation may have ended without violence, but it left deep questions in the national conscience. When men of authority quarrel in the open, institutions tremble. The people, once again, become spectators in a theatre of misplaced pride.
It is time for all who hold office — civilian or military — to remember that they serve under the same flag. That flag is neither khaki nor political colour; it is green-white-green, and it demands humility.
No victor, no vanquish only a lesson for a nation still learning to govern itself with dignity.
By; King Onunwor
Opinion
Ndifon’s Verdict and University Power Reform
Opinion
As Nigeria’s Insecurity Rings Alarm
-
Business4 days agoCBN Revises Cash Withdrawal Rules January 2026, Ends Special Authorisation
-
Business4 days ago
Shippers Council Vows Commitment To Security At Nigerian Ports
-
Business4 days agoFIRS Clarifies New Tax Laws, Debunks Levy Misconceptions
-
Politics4 days agoTinubu Increases Ambassador-nominees to 65, Seeks Senate’s Confirmation
-
Business4 days agoNigeria Risks Talents Exodus In Oil And Gas Sector – PENGASSAN
-
Sports4 days ago
Obagi Emerges OML 58 Football Cup Champions
-
Business4 days ago
NCDMB, Others Task Youths On Skills Acquisition, Peace
-
Sports4 days agoFOOTBALL FANS FIESTA IN PH IS TO PROMOTE PEACE, UNITY – Oputa
