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Female Inheritance: Untold Story Of The Igbo Woman

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Female children in the
eastern part of Nigeria have suffered so much neglect and exclusion from being involved in their family inheritance due to cultural beliefs and tradition of the Igbos which invariably position the women as temporary children.
They are seen and treated as less important to the family, yet when serious needs arise in the family they are looked upon for solution; the reason being that male children perpetuate the     man’s generation, unlike the woman who gets married and bears the name of her husband.
Also, a female child has no hope of inheriting from her father’s property and as such she must get married. She is deprived of even partaking from her husband’s estates in the event of his death especially if she has no male child or that her children are still very young. This is worsened by the activities of the Skylock relatives who would want to take undue advantage of her situation to have everything to themselves.
In some cases, the husband’s family arranges and marries a younger lady for the man in order to have male children and the first wife, who actually laboured with the man is relegated to the background and eventually pushed out of the house when the male child eventually comes from the other woman.
In spite of this, the Igbo woman is expected to remain in her husband’s house no matter any maltreatment meted out on her by her spouse or family members because she, as a woman, does not have a place in her father’s house. This has often brought untold suffering to most Igbo women, especially the uneducated ones.
There have been cases where women end up begging in streets or spending the rest of their lives in strange lands because they cannot go back to their fathers’ houses after being sent away by their husbands’ families.
Most women are often subjected to the widowhood tradition where they are forced to drink the bath water of their husbands’ corpses especially when they die under mysterious circumstances. They are also forced to sleep with their husbands’ corpses on the same beds during the night of the wake-keep and afterwards swear before a village shrine to prove their innocence or otherwise.
Until recently that women are taking up career jobs and can actually live independently and acquire landed property, some Igbo women were marrying men that were far older than their age while some ended up as second or third wives, just to have a home.
Recounting her story, Madam Martha in Anaocha Local Government Area of Anambra State, narrated how she was forced to leave her matrimonial home for giving birth to only female child.
Martha said that since she could not give her husband a male child after 18 years of marriage, he became hostile to her, beating her at every slight provocation, calling her names, and severally threatening to send her back to her family. Her words, “I was married to my husband for over 18 years and during these years I suffered molestation in the hands of my husband. My crime was my inability to give my husband a male child.
“At a point my husband became impatient and got married to another woman, who came in and immediately gave birth to a male child. Since that child was born my life had become a nightmare. My husband even stopped taking care of me and my daughter who is presently an undergraduate. “My husband always comes home with lots of food item, because  he works in the community only to give everything to his second wife in my presence just to make me feel bad.
“Recently, in a bid to chase me out of the house, my husband threatened to kill me with a matchet if not for the quick intervention of his kinsmen.
“The next day I reported the threat to the police and the village vigilante, where he was     forced under oath not to beat me again”.
Another sympathetic story is that of a mother of two beautiful daughters, who was denied presence at her own daughter’s traditional marriage ceremony in January 2015 for failing to give her husband male child.
The lady, who preferred to remain anonymous for fear of victimisation and threat to her life said she had suffered several harassments from her ex-husband even when she was no more     married to him. Hear her.
“My husband drove me away from our house years ago and has always threatened to harm me whenever he sees me around the community. With the steady beating and threat from him, I became ill from where I rented a room to live with my two daughters.
“When I became helpless, I contacted my family, where my sister came and took me to Onitsha for solace.
“I have two daughters that I nave single-handedly trained to be women after we were driven out of their father’s house. Unfortunately, on the day of my first daughter’s marriage, I was denied access to witness the celebration of the child I carried in my womb and gave birth to, I suffered to train them but I thank God the marriage ceremony was a success”, she sobbed.
Azuka, being the first child of her mother from a polygamous home said her mother, Madam Florence, though now late, had three daughters. Their father had houses both at home and in Port Harcourt city where they all lived till the demise of their father but her mother was denied of any of the property because she only had female children.
“Before his death in 2009, he shared his landed properties among his male children which he had with  another wife, and left nothing for my mother and her children because they are all female children.
“My father refused to share the property in Port Harcourt to anyone, saying that the resources generated from it would be used to care for his wives and his eight children.
“But after my father’s burial  my step-brother laid claim to the house with support from his sibling.
All efforts to compel my step-brother to allow us be part of the sharing of that house proved abortive.
“When my mother died we rushed to the village only for our kinsmen to tell us that my step brother must give approval before any arrangement could be made on my late mother’s, burial. At that point, I wept and wished I or any of my siblings was a male child.
Speaking on why the Igbo society do not recognise women the Parish priest of St Mary’s Catholic Church, Neni, Anaocha LGA of Anambra State, Fr Martins Anyabo, argued that the Igbos practise the Jewish tradition, where women are seen as second fiddles.
“In the first instance, the Igbos believe that they have Jewish origin. In Jewish tradition, in most cases they don’t consider women as eligible beneficiaries of their father’s heritage. In our understanding, women do not remain perm anent in their father’s house, they are married out to their spouses, so there is no reason to inherit their father’s properties any more.
“It is only problematic where a woman neither lives in her husband’s house nor in her father’s. Any  married woman should focus on her husband’s house and not think of inheriting her father’s property too”, he emphasised.
Fr. Anyabo argued that “if a married woman loses the husband, automatically she becomes the next of kin, and her husband’s property should be shared to her too. But in a case where the widow may have maltreated her husband to death, the daughters in the family (Umu-Ada) and kinsmen (Umu-Nna) may want to pay her back by denying her  the right to her husband’s properties.”
He condemned a situation where some families deny the widow her right for no just cause, saying, “It is not always good to intimidate women in their husband’s houses. Give to every woman her due right for peace to reign. For a married woman to come and struggle for her father’s properties, I do not agree to that, because it shows greed. Civilization has introduced will, in which a man (owner of the property) chooses who inherits any of his properties when he dies.” He concludes.
Today, some human rights organisations, including the International Federation of Women Lawyers, FIDA, are taking up cases of women disinheritance, fighting for women who are deprived of their rights in their husband’s house.
The founder of the Integrated Anti-Human Trafficking and Community Development Initiative (Intercom Africa), Okoye Hope Nkiruka, said, the culture of depriving female children of their father’s property has so much impoverished women in the South-East and that is why the girl-child and women are vulnerable to trafficking and other forms of abuses.
In her view, anybody still holding firm in the name of tradition or culture to this discriminatory practice against the girl-child, is irresponsible and selfish.
Barr Ifeoma Katchy, FIDA chairperson in Anambra State, explained that “FIDA Anambra State chapter has among several efforts to assuage the plight of the women, co-sponsored laws, namely the Administration of Criminal Law, 2010 of Anambra State, the Widowhood Law of the Anambra State 2005, which was signed by the former Governor Chris Nwabueze Ngige.” We also have the CEDAW, (Centre for Elimination of Discrimination Against Women), which is in line with the provisions of the procedure to the Africa Charter on the rights of women in Africa, although not yet domesticated in Nigeria, stressing that CEDA W instruments are domesticated in Anambra State, the State, through the Widowhood Law that came up subsequently.
In many cases too, the Nigerian Film Industry known as Nollywood has written and acted movies aimed at abolishing this tradition. However, how far this can go to affect the Igbo tradition is yet to be seen as the Igbos seem to hold rigidly to this tradition more than any other part of Nigeria.
Ibunge writes for National Network.

 

Blessing Ibunge

Barr. Ifeoma Katchy (Anambra FIDA) and Okoye Hope Nkiruka (Intercom Africa)

Barr. Ifeoma Katchy (Anambra FIDA) and Okoye Hope Nkiruka (Intercom Africa)

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City Crime

Women And Dangers Of Obnoxious Practices

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It is worrisome to hear that a woman or a girl is bathed with acidic contents just because she refuses to adhere to one instruction or the other from an opposite sex.
Sometimes, you see a woman with bruises on the face, with one eye swollen as if she is an animal perhaps she demanded one or two things from her spouse.
A situation where a widow will be mandated to marry a brother-in-law for her to still belong to the family where she is married and to partake in inheritance should be looked into.
Severally, there have been talks, seminars, workshops, fora, arguments, bills and laws abolishing the issues that concern women, especially violence.  But much has not been achieved to curtail the menace.
Violence against girls and women has been on the increase.  From time to time, it is either girls are denied access to father’s property or a widow is denied inheritance to husband’s properties.  Even when laws are put in place about things that will help women have their rights, some persons feel that culture and tradition do not permit such laws.
We are aware that some women are rich and may not want to partake in the share of their late parents’ property, but there are vulnerable ones who may need to be empowered, through perhaps, late parents’ property inheritance.
Some of the obnoxious laws were made before now without the consent of women. There was no enough representation to either argue for or against so as to be beneficial to women generally.  Some of the laws were so primitive that even when civilisation came, became difficult to change. Very unfortunately, it is the women sometimes who execute the laws made by men in their absence. But women are suffering it.
If government can establish laws abolishing certain practices against women and girls, it will be better for them and should in the presence of women so that they can contribute as well.
For long, laws against female genital mutilation and circumcision have existed but some communities with their culture and tradition have refused to put a stop to it with reasons best known to them.
Circumcision of a full-grown girl or lady may not be the only way of attaining maturity. It is a harmful practice and the pain associated with it cannot be imagined.  The illegal operation is not performed in the hospital so the dangers inherent will be much.
For those who still practise it, the menace should be discouraged as that is not a proper way of ushering a girl into womanhood. A lot of women lose their lives due to pains experienced during the process. If it was practised in the past when civilisation was not there, it is a different case, nowadays with science and technology proving it wrong, those who still practice should resist.
We know that government is doing a lot to save women and girls from some of the pains they go through but right steps should be taken in the right direction  and all stakeholders intensify efforts in dealing with persons who perpetuate evil against their fellow women.
One issue that comes to mind is implementation even if policies and laws are out in place by relevant agencies.  The issues have been dwelt on for decades, but it is still practised as big ceremonies in some communities.
When it comes to inheritance, a girl born into a family, married or unmarried will be denied access to father’s property.
When parents are sick, the female child will pick him or her for care and offset medical bills.  If it has to do with the demise of parents, the woman and the husband will be mandated to provide a cow and perform other burial rites.
If the National Assembly makes laws concerning the well-being of women, community heads, molecular leaders, women groups and associations, religious organisations, Non-Governmental organizations (NGOs) and Civil Society Organisations (CSOs) should create more awareness through the media to sensitise rural dwellers.
In this digital era, it should be forbidden that a woman loses her spouse and she is mandated to drink water used on the late husband.
A legal practitioner,  Tam Jacobs, said if one forcefully shaves a woman’s hair with the intention that she is mourning her late spouse, she can sue that person for assault.
He said if the woman is forced to drink water used on her late husband’s body, she can also sue for attempted murder.
According to him, several cases of girl-child inheritance have been won and documented in the law court but some cannot claim it.
“Even a widow who is handicapped may not be able to make attempts so NGOs, CSOs should be in the forefront to support them and ensure that the laws are implemented at the grassroots level where they are practised”, he said.
A pharmacist, Eno Amos said any culture that does not add colour and value to life, especially as it concerns women should be abolished.
She added that implementation can be easy in the cities where awareness has been created but expressed fear that it may not be easy in the rural areas where culture is really practised.
A business woman, Agnes Ugwu, said tradition and culture were made by man and not God and wondered why people who claim to be educated still follow the tradition of ancestors who never went to school.
Ignorance also comes to play here.  If you have watched a documentary showing female genital mutilation and the gory experience the young women go through is something else.  Some of the perpetrators claim that the practice has existed for ages. Women have to learn more about issues that concern them.
A nurse, Rosy Ekeocha, said it is not about culture but about the behavior of a group of people in the community who force it on others.
According to her, let people change their behaviour and leave culture alone.  It does not happen in every family and if any family allows it that is its business.
She said we are in the 21st century, certain cultures and tradition need to be reviewed to ensure that they align with today’s reality.
Culture is dynamic she said, but that implementation of laws relating to the vulnerable in the society calls for concern.
We should not behave the way people behaved twenty decades ago, after all, we do not dress the way our forefathers dressed.  Time has evolved and things are getting better as it concerns women. We are getting more exposed and more enlightened about issues that concern us.  Information is moving round as the world is a global village.
Talking about culture nowadays, we wear shoes whereas our forefathers never had any.  They walked barefooted
far distances to get family necessities but things are better now as we are mobile.
That should also happen to culture and tradition.  There are certain aspects of our culture and tradition which are practised today that have expired long ago. We should get rid off them.
Sometime, the bill for prohibition of obnoxious practices against women at the National Assembly was a welcome development, how far have the powers that be gone to ensure that it favours women.
It is expected that the bills abolishing obnoxious practices against women and girls in the society should have started achieving results as it concerns their wellbeing.
Eunice Choko-Kayode
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Women

Early Start Of Education: The Dangers On Children 

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There are worries these days about the way parents are sending their kids to school earlier than it was many years ago.
 A situation where children of six and nine months are sent to creche and day care centres all in the name of starting them early.
Although some parents whose schedules are tight say they have no choice than to do that since getting a house help or nanny has a lot of implications for the child and the family.
But aside that, some people feel that the benefit of sending their children to school so early will help them secure job early. And the issue of starting life early.
So many years ago, children of school age were not allowed to start school until their hands could cross from one part of their ear to another. That was the yardstick used to ascertain whether a pupil could start school or not.
It is important that our wards acquire education early but their lives should not be put on danger because parents want them to finish school early.
The truth is that parents are pushing their children into school these days as if there is competition among families and friends. This is not healthy enough for our young ones.
I don’t understand why a child of 12 years should be in Senior Secondary School (SS2). It means that the child will be and graduate at age 13 or 14 in SSS3.  This should be discouraged by school managers.
Which university will admit a student of 14 or 15 when universities insist they must be 16 years-old before being admitted. I’ve seen a child who performed well both in SSCE and UTME but was denied admission  by one of the  universities because he was below 16 years.
In fact, the stakeholders have come up with the issue well clarified that, students seeking admission into the universities must be 16 years of age. That’s a welcome development.
Maturity is one of the factors affecting teaching and learning process. Parents should not send their children to school earlier than it should be.
No matter how intelligent a child is, he should not be allowed to jump any class.  School managers should resist parents who may want their children to jump from one class to another.
Even if a child scores Excellent in all subjects in a particular class, that child should be allowed to touch all the classes, complete primary 6 of lower basic.  That will make a significant impact on that child.
Many of us year back started secondary school at the age of 12 and 13 and never lost anything, as we graduated at 17, 18 and 19 before seeking admission into the university.
Back in secondary school, some students were already 20 years and never bordered being in the same class with younger persons.
There are children who are exceptionally good but that does not mean a child should be sent to school prematurely. That child may suffer inferiority complex in the midst of seniors.
Children should be allowed to move with their peers. This will give them a sense of belonging among peers.  When a child begins to nurse the problem of inferiority complex, he will certainly experience withdrawal syndrome. Peer group pressure becomes a problem on the child.
Those are some of the challenges resulting from keeping younger persons among the older ones. We are not in danger so we should not put our children into such uncomfortable scenario.
Nowadays, children are getting into school at tender age as parents dictate. There are things children are supposed to learn as kids at a particular level and when they jump such level and get to a point where parents want them to be, one day, those children will definitely feel it and the significant of that particular level will manifest.
Children should be allowed to enjoy whatever thing they are meant to enjoy at every level. No level of a child’s development should be ignored. Every stage of development is important no matter how intelligent that child may be.
Stakeholders know why every curriculum is prepared in a way to sooth every child so parents should allow children to enjoy every stage in their lives.
A teacher once told me that children below 10 years who find themselves on secondary schools do not concentrate in class.  They find it difficult to concentrate no matter what the teacher does.
Parents deny their kids parental care.  Sometimes in schools, parents abandon their wards at the mercy of minders after school hours, up to 6:00 p. m.  Whereas they should have gone home earlier to prepare for the next day.
Even at home, they are left in the hands of house helps and nannies while parents are busy looking for money.  Children are denied parental care and are not getting full maturity because of these factors.
Another reason for this rush by parents is pride.  A parent may be boasting that his child is either in ABC school and representing the whole world while another person’s child is at home or one “inferior” school.
Children who are pushed into school prematurely do not sustain it most times.  Students of 15 and 16 years-old going into university can suffer depression according to research.
Researches have also shown that they (younger) ones risk the problem of mental health more than the older classmates.
In the case of creche and day care centres, the idea is not really to acquire education yet, some parents decide to keep their babies so that they can go about their daily businesses.  It is true they need money to cater for their households, but should avoid that tender age, the best training any child can have is from parents, while teachers and caregivers are secondary.
Teaching and learning process begin with the parents.  No matter how tight the parents’ schedules may be, they must take care of their kids. Parents must devote time to nurture and teach their children many things that they cannot learn in classroom.  They should not rush them through life all in a bid to acquire education early.
It is worrisome that parents rush their children to school while they cannot speak and understand their languages and dialects.
One of the guidelines in the National Policy in Education is that children should be taught in their mother tongue at home while they learn foreign language in school.
The NPE  also stipulates that every child at the basic level should be taught the language of the place of residence. If school managers are not obeying the instruction, parents need to do a follow-up.
Parents rush their children to school while they do not understand their environment, culture and tradition of theirs and others. Although a few schools devote little time to mark cultural day for the kids.
It is good that children start school early and graduate at 20, 21 and may be get a job at 23 and 24 as some employers will indicate.
Recently, organisations were inviting graduates of between 23 and 25 years for job offers. This caused a lot of reactions from the public. The question people asked was about when the children started school and youth corps service to seek for job in the labour market.
There was a period students secured admission between the ages of 22 and 23 years as a result of either delay in obtaining credits in their choice of disciplines and high scores in UTME.  They still graduated at 27 and 28 before proceeding for national youth service.
I think this is one of the reasons why many decide to start their children early to scale through those external exams early enough.
When parents start their children early, they may be exposed to emotional and psychological problems in schools. A lot of them make more friends for protection as they are easily apprehensive.
The morals they needed both at home would have been denied them. At the end of the day, they may acquire good education but lack morals.
The family is the first school for the child but because parents are engaged, the creche and day care centres become their option.
Early start for the children affects their productivity.  Factors like home, society and government are responsible.
Charity, they say, begins at home.  Parents must have a balance.  It is a known fact to that parents need to work to provide money for the family but must make out time to take care of the children.
Eunice Choko-Kayode
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Women

Who Is A Classic Woman? 

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A classic woman is one  who has identified herself in terms of fashion, occupation  or the kind of business she does.
A woman can be classical in the way she entertains her audience in terms of music and movies.  You will discover that some female musicians are identified with the kind of music they sing.
A classical woman is one who always wants to appear trendy.
Generally, classical women are normally identified with the kind of things they are involved in.
There are ladies that want to be identified with wearing of shorts (short trousers) in the public. They use it to showcase their beauty. They want to be identified with such things as they see it as socialisation.
Some wear trousers that are so tight just to showcase all the curves they possess.
Consultant stylists and etiquette experts say some fashions won by some persons are inappropriate because of how and when they are won.
A classic woman is supposed to dress properly.   She should  be able to wear clothes  that will not expose hidden parts of her body. When such occurs,  then it is indecent dressing.
Ladies should be known for two things, classical and beauty.  One can be classic with minimisation.  The minimum woman should go is to look good, decent and presentable.
Some ladies like wearing short skirts but no matter  how short the skirt is,  it should look elegant. The skirt  should not be too short like the mini-skirt.
Dressing or fashion depends on the environment the persons finds herself.  The kind of clothes won to the office may be different from the one won at home. Likewise,  a dress won to a party may be different from the one won too swimming pool.
For one to look classical or decent, body shape should be taken into consideration.
Colours of a particular fashion can make one look odd or nice.  Looking model does not mean that one should go naked or dull.
Don’t wear clothes  that you need to drag from time to time in order not to expose yourself.
Eunice Choko-Kayode
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