Opinion

Of Fathers And Paternity Leave

Published

7 years ago

January 13, 2020

In Africa, the woman is nearly worshipped when she is pregnant. Everything about the family revolves around her during the nine months gestation period. She is given serious attention and, most times, restricted from doing hard tasks or chores that put her life and that of the unborn baby at risk.
It is perhaps this culture that may have given birth to “maternity leave” as it’s called in the Western world where pregnant women are given time to rest, give birth and nurture their babies for, at least, three months before resuming work.
Maternity leave is entrenched in the labour laws such that it’s the right of the woman to stop work once she nears her delivery date. Sometimes this starts three months before putting to bed. So, inadvertently, the men have to work hard to close up any shortfall at those periods both at home and office. There is an African proverb that says “a man is pregnant just like his wife during pregnancy”. The man ensures that his wife puts to bed safely and this entails doing domestic and office work to make sure the woman is comfortable.
Latest legislation in Europe to support maternity leave has risen over the years. In the USA, pregnant women take six to 12 weeks of maternity leave, though much of it unpaid, before returning to work. Maternity leave in Britain is now 12 months with new mums receiving up to full pay for the first six months.
In Sweden, parents can share up to 16 months leave after birth, with up to 80 percent pay. In Germany, mothers can return to their jobs up to three years after giving birth and, in some circumstances, may even take the third year of this leave up until the child’s eighth birthday.
The question then is where is the consideration for the fathers who bear the brunt of this long absence from work by the women? By the way, it’s the same fathers who try to make ends meet; while they work at the office, they also come back home to take care of their wives and children. The men, during this period, are overworked, stressed and financially strained. Remember it’s during this period he spends most of his earnings in buying milk, nappies, providing good food for the breastfeeding wife.
So, while the woman returns to work after almost nine months of leave, the man continues to work without rest till another pregnancy cycle. The cycle continues till the man retires and dies.
It is based on this argument that many labour activists are calling for “paternity leave”. Their view is predicated on the belief that gains from maternity leave would be multiplied if countries extend it to apply to fathers too. Their argument goes further to claim that those (women) who take long leave off work see their skills grow rusty and fail to gain experience and promotions. Some employers still avoid hiring women they think will be away a lot.
That, however, does not take away roles women play in the work place, nor does it diminish the right of fathers to take leave in order to rest from the stress they face when their wives are pregnant.
The fact is that men these days are overburdened by the rat race and the domestic war front. Their health are threatened in such a way that many can fall sick.
This is likely the reason why some European countries are beginning to make room for fathers by encouraging them to share the leave period with their wives. In Sweden, for example, couples get “equality bonus” for splitting their time off more evenly. When a woman hands her baby to the father and heads out of the door to work, he learns how to be a better parent.
Fathers who even take short paternity leave play a bigger role in child-rearing years later. Studies indicate that babies whose fathers take paternity leave go on to do better in cognitive tests at school.
Rather than simply cutting maternity leave in response to such findings, a growing number of governments are trying to spread the child-rearing burden between mums and dads.
Britain, sometime in 2015, decided to combine maternity and paternity leaves into a single chink of parental leave, to be split between mother and father.
To overcome the obstacle created by legislation, some countries are giving fathers enough perks. In a few, including Chile, Italy and Portugal, paternity leave is compulsory. Others offer incentives that are hard to turn down. Sweden relaxed its gender neutral approach and now grants a bonus to parents who share leave more equally. The real picture is that where leave is well paid and not seen as gender sensitive, fathers seem willing to request for it. But traditional maternity leaving which channels men into bread winning and women into child-rearing is hardly neutral. Shared parenting stands to improve women’s careers, children’s development and father’s satisfaction.
As to the social benefits, research has affirmed that children benefit more when their fathers take leave and nurture them. A Norwegian study found that it improved children’s performance at school, daughters most especially seemed to flourish if their dads had taken time off. It could be that dads who take paternity leave are more dedicated to the domestic front than those who do not.
Because paternity leave tends to be short and poorly paid or even nonexistent, leaving fathers tend to rely on their annual holiday allowance. In Nigeria where most states are gradually phasing out leave allowance, granting paternity leave brings no incentive as some men would rather work their asses out than be subjugated to few weeks of absence from work without pay.
On the other hand, there is need for serious consideration of the matter by policy makers, looking at the social benefits. The visiting social vices and deviant behaviour by young men point to the need why fathers should take time off and give attention to their kids. Habits formed during the child’s first year stick.

Opinion

Professor Kamene Okonjo: A Life Beyond Motherhood

Published

6 days ago

November 2, 2026

The Tide

Quote “Professor Kamene Okonjo’s life was a testament to the power of scholarship, courage and service. Beyond raising a daughter who would attain global prominence, she distinguished herself as an accomplished sociologist, an advocate for women’s empowerment and a royal matriarch whose remarkable journey included surviving a kidnapping at 82. At 96, she leaves behind a legacy that transcends family ties and deserves enduring recognition.”

Some women leave behind more than a family name. They leave behind a legacy of intellectual accomplishment, courage, service and commitment to humanity that deserves to be celebrated long after their departure. Professor Kamene Okonjo, the renowned sociologist, women’s rights advocate and mother of Dr Ngozi Okonjo-Iweala, Director-General of the World Trade Organisation (WTO), was one such woman. Professor Okonjo died on Friday, October 23, 2026, at the age of 96. Her death was announced on Sunday October 25, 2026 by the Umu Obi Obahai Royal Family of Ogwashi-Uku Kingdom in Delta State. Her passing has drawn tributes to a life distinguished by academic excellence, dedication to family, community service and the advancement of women.

Yet, to remember Professor Kamene Okonjo merely as the mother of one of Nigeria’s most internationally recognised women would be to tell only a part of her story. She was an accomplished academic whose contributions to sociology earned her recognition beyond Nigeria. Her lifelong interest in women’s rights and empowerment reflected a conviction that women deserved opportunities to develop their abilities and contribute meaningfully to society. Her life demonstrated that a woman could combine professional distinction with family responsibilities and traditional obligations without allowing one aspect of her identity to diminish the others. She occupied a place in the academic community while remaining a respected figure within the royal institution of Ogwashi-Uku.

Professor Okonjo was the beloved wife of the late Professor Chukwuka Okonjo, a distinguished scholar and former Obi of Ogwashi-Uku. Their marriage lasted 66 years, representing decades of companionship, family building and shared responsibilities. Together, they raised children who made their own contributions to society, including Dr Ngozi Okonjo-Iweala, who served as Nigeria’s Finance Minister before becoming the first woman and first African to lead the WTO. Her daughter’s international accomplishments have naturally brought additional attention to the family. However, the late professor’s own scholarly achievements and advocacy for women’s advancement deserve recognition in their own right. The achievements of children may bring honour to their parents, but they should never obscure the individual contributions of those parents.

one of the most dramatic chapters of her life occurred in december 2012, when she was 82 years old. On December 9, 2012, Professor Okonjo was kidnapped in Delta State, an incident that attracted national and international attention. Her abduction was particularly disturbing because of her advanced age and the public position occupied by her daughter, who was then serving as Nigeria’s Finance Minister under President Goodluck Jonathan. Reports at the time indicated that her abductors demanded a substantial ransom. The incident also generated widespread concern about insecurity in the Niger Delta and the vulnerability of citizens to kidnapping. For five days, the family endured uncertainty over her whereabouts and safety. The situation became a major national concern, with security agencies intensifying efforts to secure her release.

On December 14, 2012, the then Delta State Governor, Emmanuel Uduaghan, confirmed that Professor Okonjo had been released. According to reports, she was dropped off near her residence. The governor attributed her release to pressure from security operatives, although the precise circumstances surrounding the incident remained unclear. Her release brought relief to her family and the wider public. At 82, she had survived an ordeal that exposed the frightening reality of kidnapping in Nigeria. Her experience remains a reminder that insecurity does not discriminate by age, social standing or family background. Nearly 14 years later, Professor Okonjo’s death at 96 closes a remarkable chapter in the story of a woman whose life encompassed scholarship, motherhood, royal responsibilities and personal resilience.

She leaves behind children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren, as well as a legacy that extends beyond her immediate family. The royal family described her as a woman of exceptional intellect, humility, compassion and grace. These qualities, alongside her academic achievements and commitment to women’s empowerment, form an important part of her enduring contribution. Her passing also offers an opportunity to reflect on the often-overlooked contributions of women whose influence may be overshadowed by the public achievements of their relatives. Behind many prominent Nigerians are parents, mentors and family members whose sacrifices, values and personal accomplishments helped shape their own journeys.

Professor Kamene Okonjo deserves to be remembered not simply because she was the mother of a globally influential woman, but because she was herself a scholar, an advocate and a woman who lived through extraordinary circumstances with dignity. At 96, she had completed a long journey marked by intellectual distinction, family devotion and service. Her story reminds younger generations that a meaningful life is measured not only by longevity or public recognition, but also by the knowledge imparted, the people encouraged and the causes advanced. As the Okonjo family and Ogwashi-Uku Kingdom mourn their matriarch, her life offers a fitting lesson: true legacies are built through years of purposeful living, and their influence continues long after their authors have departed. May her soul rest in perfect peace.

By: Sylvia ThankGod-Amadi

Opinion

On Ancestrial Worship: My Take

Published

6 days ago

November 2, 2026

The Tide

Quote: An African who invokes the spirits of his ancestors is branded an idolater, yet Christians invoke Abraham, Isaac and Jacob in prayer. Why is one tradition revered while the other is condemned?”

This is the concluding part of this story, published first in our October 30, 2026 edition.

… Given the fact that I was the chairman of the Sports Committee of Rivers State School of Basic Studies (SBS no Captain Elechi Amadi Polytechnic CEAP) and the Commissioner of Youths and Sports was billed to flag off the school games that day, I could not join them on the trip. It was in view of the above reality that I planned the return trip to Owerri for Wednesday. Resultantly, I asked them to keep the date since Chief Abasi was part of the process, knew the venue and had the details of the contract. They pulled off the short driveway and I waved them goodbye; I watched the beautiful and effervescent Auntie Alice, the diligent and organized Chief AM Abasi and the very dutiful driver roll out of the gates of SBS compound on the journey to Owerri.

At the end of the visit by the Honorable Commissioner and the hectic day of the flag off, I retired to my apartment. At about 7.30pm, the phone rang, I picked and it was the unmistakable voice of Chief Ranami Abah; he sounded relieved. In some excitement, he said “Ehe, Jason, you people are back”. I answered in the negative and explained why I did not travel with them. In a voice laden with worries, he narrated all the efforts he had made to reach them and wondered if I could Mr. Nwaorgu. Unfortunately, I only had Nwaorgu’s office number and didn’t know if he had a phone at home. I quickly drove to Chief’s house where his friends had gathered. HE Melford Okilo, HRH Ere, Dr. LongJohn etc. were there and thoughts went in every direction.

Back to my apartment, at about 1am, a dog barked in the direction of the school gate. In the stillness of the night, the bark echoed and reverberated across the campus. Shortly thereafter, another dog barked and then another and, in what came across as a relay, the barks came towards the direction of my area of the compound. As soon as the next-door neighbor’s dog stopped barking, there was an eerie sign of non-human presence in my bedroom. Christy, my spouse, sat up quickly in bed and nervously said “I can perceive Auntie Alice’s perform”. At that, I sat up immediately and having had OBE at Georgetown University Medical Center, Washington DC in May 1975, I knew that consciousness survives the death of the human body. With the eerie presence coupled with Christy’s observation, I spoke thus: “Auntie Alice, you can see and hear us but we can neither see nor hear you.

Under normal circumstances, you should not see us the way we are now. You have left your body in what we refer to as death but you know that your spirit is still alive. By coming close to us, you could hurt us without meaning to. So, go on in your new setting. I promise to ensure that Chief gives you a befitting burial”. At that point, the air of strange presence cleared, the dog next door barked and the relay of barks commenced in reverse order until the dog at the gate barked. In total shock, Christy looked at me with wide eyes and, in Ogbia dialect, she nervously muttered a sentence that included a word that means “wizard”. By the way, Auntie Alice had visited me once and, in a very pensive mood, told me that she knows that she will die before Chief.

That all she asks is that Chief should give her a befitting burial. Christy and I sat frozen; it was obvious to us that Auntie Alice had died. What about Chief Abasi and the driver? Our thoughts went wild in every direction until we fell asleep. The next morning, Christy and I went to Chief’s house where his friends and relatives had gathered; the atmosphere was dreary and everybody wore a long face and talked In whispers. Christy and I knew something they didn’t but we kept it to ourselves. At about 8.30am, I put a call across to Mr. Nwaorgu and the chilling truth came out: Chief Abasi and Auntie Alice did not keep the appointment; not on Wednesday neither on Thursday. A search party, which Chief insisted on leading, set off on the route of the journey.

For some reason that I do not recollect now, I was not part of the party. As the search party found out, at Umuapu, the blue Peugeot 504 rammed into a stationery truck. Auntie Alice and Chief Abasi died on the spot; the driver, who survived the collision, died on the way to the hospital at Owerri. Today, I recollect vividly that throughout that experience, I did not pray to God or to Him through Jesus Christ not to talk of the Virgin Mary of Catholicism. This is not to say that I do not believe in God; I do without any reservation whatsoever. I even pride myself saying that I believe in God more that a majority of the Clergies and Clerics that abound in institutional religion. However, I consider the issue of Jesus being “the only begotten Son of God” through whom I must pray, as preposterous and anti-Christ.

I believe that everyone in humanity is directly connected to the Divine. Therefore, we do not need any intermediary, not the priest, Jesus, Imam or whoever to connect with the Source if only we keep clean this Temple of God, which our soul occupies for now. In the universality of the ministry of Jesus, he did not claim divinity and an object to be worshiped, NO!!! Rather, he gave humanity an effectual template through which to strive and achieve what he achieved and even more. Hear him “Verily, verily, I say unto you, He that believeth on me, the works that I do shall he do also; and greater works than these shall he do” (John 14:12) Osai and his son Lazarus heard my cry and, I believe, played a role in the mystery of the narrative; Auntie Alice listened to me and heeded my advice.

Our ancestors have not gone far from us. They exist in another dimension from which they see and influence our daily lives in this dimension in the multiplicity of dimensions in God’s creation. Metaphorically and allegorically, Jesus referred to this as “many mansions in my father’s house (John 14:2). My advise to the reader is thus: in your daily prayer to God, feel free to invoke the spirit of your ancestors; they are here with us and they know and understand our problems and feel for us much more than Abraham, Isaac and Jacob. With a clean heart, mind and hand; with absolute belief in God and with a spirit of gratitude and contentment you command your circumstance. “He that hath ears to hear, let him hear”.

By: Jason Osai

Opinion

FG’s Transport Support And Rivers Workers

Published

1 week ago

October 30, 2026

The Tide

The Federal Government’s approval of a N70,000 monthly transport intervention for public service workers for six months, beginning in November 2026, offers hope to employees struggling with the rising cost of living. The agreement with the Nigeria Labour Congress (NLC), reached at a conciliation meeting in Abuja on October 27, is intended to cushion transport costs and ease pressure on workers’ incomes. But for public servants in Rivers State, it raises a familiar question: will the State Government key into the intervention and ensure that its workers benefit? The agreement provides for N70,000 monthly across all levels, for six months. The Federal Government also approved peculiar allowance arrears effective from May 1, 2026, to be paid in three equal instalments beginning in November.
The parties agreed to reconvene after one month to assess implementation. Ultimately, the value of these resolutions will be measured not by announcements but by whether eligible workers receive the money. Transport costs consume a substantial share of many civil servants’ earnings before they can meet household needs. Support for commuting is therefore not a luxury or political favour; it is temporary assistance to help workers remain at their jobs without sinking further into hardship. For lower-paid employees, transport costs can turn modest salaries into a daily exercise in difficult choices and sacrifice.
The agreement also urges State and Local Governments to participate and unions to press for implementation. The federal agreement does not automatically guarantee that every State and Local Government employee will receive the support. State authorities must clarify how it will apply to their workforce, make the necessary arrangements and publish a payment timetable. Rivers State must approach the arrangement with urgency and transparency. The Government should State whether it will implement the intervention and when payments will begin. Any administrative or financial question should be addressed promptly with organised labour, not allowed to become excuses for delay.
The concern is sharpened by the earlier N35,000 monthly wage award introduced by the Federal Government in 2023 after petrol subsidy removal. It was intended as temporary relief pending a new national minimum wage. While several States negotiated and paid wage awards or related sums, implementation nationwide was uneven. Reports in 2024 indicated that many States had failed to pay the federal award, while others provided different amounts. In Rivers, labour and media reports raised concerns about implementation of the N35,000 award for State workers, amid separate announcements and arrangements concerning Local Government employees.
The wage award was meant to ease the immediate effects of subsidy removal, yet workers faced uncertainty over whether the promised relief would reach them. In February 2024, the Rivers State Government announced approval of the N35,000 award for local government workers, but subsequent reports showed that implementation across worker categories remained a concern. The lesson is clear: approval and implementation are not the same. A declaration at a meeting offers little comfort to a worker whose account does not reflect the promised payment. For workers who travel to their offices daily, the implications of delayed support are significant. Transportation expenses compete with food, rent, school fees, healthcare and other essential household needs.
As fares rise, employees may be forced to reduce spending on necessities or borrow to sustain their families. A timely transport intervention would therefore provide practical relief and demonstrate that government understands the economic pressures confronting its workforce. Its temporary nature makes prompt implementation even more important. It is fair to acknowledge that this transport intervention is a new agreement and that its administrative details may require clarification. Rivers State should not be condemned in advance for a failure that has not occurred. Nevertheless, the earlier experience gives workers legitimate grounds to seek assurances before the November commencement date. The State should avoid allowing uncertainty to persist until workers begin asking why the promised assistance has not arrived.
The NLC and unions in Rivers State should engage the State Government immediately and seek a written commitment, an implementation plan and a process for reporting missed payments. If clarification from the Federal Government is needed, the State should seek it without abandoning the goal of providing relief. Labour leaders must also keep members informed about progress and insist that any agreed arrangements are applied fairly and transparently. The Rivers State Government should treat this intervention as an opportunity to rebuild confidence. Timely support would show that workers’ welfare is more than a talking point and that the State recognises the economic realities confronting its employees.
Silence, delay or selective implementation, by contrast, would revive frustration over earlier relief measures and weaken trust between government and labour. Every month lost to administrative delay leaves workers facing the same transport burden without the intended assistance. The State should consult labour, publish arrangements and pay eligible workers on time. Rivers workers should not have to wonder whether federal relief will reach them. The Federal Government has announced the support; now the State must make its position clear. We hope the N70,000 monthly transport intervention will not follow the troubling path of the earlier wage award. Rivers State should learn from that experience and ensure that this time, relief is not merely promised but delivered.

Sylvia ThankGod-Amadi