Harmful traditional/customary practices – These are · Customary discrimination in property inheritance and acquisition.

· Harmful widowhood practices – for example, shaving of head, wearing of mourning clothes (black), not bathing with water and soap for some period of time, drinking bath water of late husband. These are inhuman, degrading and humiliating treatments and sometimes the widow is not allowed to remarry the person of her choice.

· Female genital mutilation/cutting – A harmful practice which lowers the self-esteem of women and the girl child and causes great pain and ill health medically. The reason for this is based on the idea the inferiority or superiority of the sexes or stereotyped roles for men and women as prescribed by custom.

· Early/child marriages or forced marriages – this is prominent in the Northern part of Nigeria (Hausas) were marriage to a minor or pre-adolescent girls are considered lawful i.e. girls who have not started menstruation are allowed to marry which pose health problems to these married children. Happily, in recent times the trend is moving toward a more acceptable standard.

· Customary ideas of divorce, separation or annulment of marriage-traditionally a girl child is given out in marriage on sale, so to speak. She is bound to endure all forms of despicable treatment that could be meted on her by her husband in her matrimonial home with little or no choice of a divorce or separation. Even under extreme physical or emotional abuse (wife beating, adultery willful non supported is proved against the husband, some customs prohibit the women from separation or divorce. She is considered a chattel (goods or property) of her husband to be used and dropped at will without equal right of the woman to do so. While not undermining the advantages of a lasting marriage, we say that this is abuse and violation of the woman’s right as prescribed for and protected even by our creator and originator of marriage, Jehovah God.

·           Discrimination and preference of boy child over the girl child.

Lack of Education/Training – a research statistics has it that over 110 million of the world’s children, two thirds of them girls, are not in school. And of the world’s 875 million illiterate adults, two thirds are women.

Illiteracy among women and girl children is alarming. Traditionally, it is the girl child who is allowed to remain at home to help their mother while the boys go to school and play thereafter. Educating a girl child was once viewed as a waste of resources. So while the girl child is engaged in domestic activities at home with her mother for the benefit of the whole family, the boys are schooled receiving formal education. For example, in the legal profession, we have very few women competing with the men, reason being that the profession was once viewed and believed to be a man’s thing. This situation plays itself out even in this 21st century where we still see and hear even mothers at home assigning domestic chores to their girl children because it is as they say a girl’s work. Seeing a man cook, shop and clean the home is regarded as a letdown. He is often called a woman’s wrapper, or one who has been bewitched by his wife.

The list is endless.

Effects On Women

The sad outcome of some of these cases of violence against women results to-

·           All forms of discrimination against women

·           Poverty which impoverishes them.

·           Lack of confidence and trust on the society

·           Loss of dignity-one dictionary defines dignity as the quality or state of being worthy, honored or esteemed. Human dignity therefore involves both the way we view ourselves and the way others deal with us. While there are a variety of factors that can affect our feelings about ourselves, the way others view or treat us plays a large role in our sense of personal value in our day to day life. While women have been identified to fall into the poor, defenseless and vulnerable group, being in such circumstances does not necessarily diminish their sense of personal dignity, it is the attitude and reaction of others that constitutes an affront to their dignity.

· Women suffer inequality and marginalization at the workplace and are disempowered and impoverished and cannot participate in public life.

· Even with multiplicity of legal instruments, because enforcement has not commenced from the home and communities, women continue to suffer in silence with little way out.

· Women are in grief because no one seems to hear their cry for help due to the culture of silence promoted by our customs or traditions.

· Women become targets and objects of all sorts of physical and emotional abuse, exploitation, objects of fear and shame in the society.

·  Part of health problems

· Children at risk of health problems, performance/and behavioral problems.

Recommendations

·           Support the campaign to end violence against women by speaking up any where you can be heard.

· Help to bring perpetrator to account.

·  Support FIDA to give voice to the passenger of meaningful laws that will ensure and implement the rights of the women/child help. The implementation by not being a victim yourself.

· Partner with us in our sensitization workshop, trainings, and advocacy from time to time.

· Support to disseminate positive information about our campaigns and educate the public through the mass media when necessary.

· Our husbands, fathers, uncles, brothers and mothers, stop the exploitation of your sisters, mothers, wives and daughters but support their roles as women.

· Above all love for others will help us to apply the counsel of our Lord Jesus Christ who once said in the Holy Bible – “do to others you will want them do to you”.

Boma Kingson Enyingwa