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Who Is An Ideal Mother?

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A mother carries her child
in her womb for nine months before she is delivered of it. This great sacrifice places the woman before her child as a perfect creature nature had ever witnessed hence, the loveliest and the most infallible. While it is very difficult to be the best of mother the society ever craves for, it is important to note that there are no fast and hard laid down rules on becoming the ideal mother. However , understanding one’s responsibility of instilling the best values in a child’s mind and bring the child up as a confident, happy and independent being remains paramount.
Therefore, an ideal mother is one who inculcates the best of family values in her children, she has tons of patience to put up with the childish tantrums and makes the child feel satisfied and happy without being over indulgent. She is the child’s best friend and is there for the child through thick and thin.
The role of a mother is a primary one for many, but not all women understand and act accordingly. Most mothers see motherhood as a major aspect of their personal and social identities, therefore, the media and culture place high value on being an ideal mother .
As a society, we are very quick to judge and condemn mothers whom we perceive as fulfilling their own needs at the expense of their children’s best interests.
Karl Jung stated that all humans are born with an innate capacity to recognize, seek out, and attach to a mother or mother figure to whom we look up to for safety, care and protection. No wonder children in the uterus (womb) recognise the mother’s voice  when born, they use the familiar voice to know who the mother is .
As this continues, the relationship between the mother and child becomes so close especially as the ideal mother takes good care of the child with great joy in her heart.
Every child believes automatically on the mother’s verdict than any other person who tries to advise him on certain situation hence, a child without an ideal mother has lapses. In that case, such a child can never be compared to a child well groomed by an ideal mother it is obvious that there is great difference between a child well trained by the mother than the father. A child trained by the mother had more advantages over the other child trained by the father because mother as a home builder, builds the child in all angles to be well behaved.
The mother’s role is widespread. The early attachment experiences between the ideal mother and child helps to shape the brain, and can affect the adult to self-regulate emotions into the adult years. Where, there is non corrective experiences, the reverse is the case such as insecure attachment and childhood trauma which of fan lead to drug and alcohol addition, academic failure and adult depression, as well as relationship problems.
Since mothers seem to have a profound influence on children’s long-term wellbeing. An ideal mother should therefore have her eyes fixed on the child at all times to understand what is happening around the child, knowing the child’s feelings and providing the child’s needs. Mother intention should be of good and not of evil, advising them and enjoying their company all the times.
An ideal mother is one who understands her role as a mother in the house, she occupies the most important position in the house. I see her as a blessing to everyone that comes around her. She loves everyone equally. She is a good companion in times of loneliness.
The ideal mother shares in a child’s worries, fears, successes and disappointments often times, she gives up parts of her own dreams, needs, wants for the wellbeing of the child she is raising. She does these out of love for the child.
A mother’s love for her child is primal, that is the strongest pull nature will make you feel for someone because survival of your kin is more important than anything else. No matter how ugly a child may look , she rather finds the child very beautiful because the child is part of her. ” Oh how painful it is without an ideal mother!”
These days it is a difficult task to see a worthy woman who can stand in the gap for the family in time of difficulties at home.
Women generally are made to be an embodiment of chastity, generosity cunning and intelligence but most of what we are seeing today is the opposite of what is supposed to be in life generally. A person must chose what he/she wants but in the case of a mother, she becomes a mother without knowing the child that is to be given birth to.
Everyone needs a mother to love, show affection and care as well as treat others with protection. Child likes to be loved especially when he/she is ill and this can only be achieved by the very first acquaintance the child makes in  life.
An ideal mother therefore teaches and correct the child, pointing out some mistakes in life that she wouldn’t want the child to fall victim of, such as having bad friends unnecessary chatting on phoneetc, giving the child the right advice is an attribute of an ideal mother.
An ideal mother comprehends the children easily than any one else in training, the mother incorporates for-bearance, longsuffering, perseverance, patience and composure.
An ideal mother is therefore found with the following good qualities which she transfer to her children. She is creative, attractive, confidence in herself. Confident is one of the best traits that a mother should have. This is one of the ideal mother’s ways of projecting what she is doing. Having every assurance and reflection of what she knows that she does not give a shit to what anyone else thinks.
There are pretty good grasp about what makes an ideal mother truly perfect. Considering this statement “no one is perfect” but to me some mothers are perfect when their advantages are more than their disadvantages. As humans, when our good deeds are more than the bad deeds we are considered good .
The first impression however is the attribute of attraction which leads to certain physical characteristics in a woman. Oh no ” beauty is in the eye of the beholder”. Meaning beauty is a function of personal understanding.
A woman is naturally or inwardly attractive to a man before becoming a mother. The physical beauty of a woman is the natural attraction while the inward attraction is her reasoning and spoken ability in as much as the embedment of these is seen in a woman, she is attributed as a mother.
She never turns away a suppliant, she even possesses the wit to test her husband upon his return to the house at all times.
She remains faithful to her husband even when the husband has nothing doing to take care of the family. She does not allow her friends to understand those lapses in the house.
It is the duty of an ideal mother to as well mother her husband. Because behind every successful man there is a great successful woman ; also behind every great man is an even greater woman”.
A mother is the person who gives life to a child. A mother is the person who gives her life to raising of a child. A person who willingly accepts the burdens, responsibilities, heart-breaks and joys of raising a child. A mother is the person who takes commitment to hardwork of life, worry and the giving of one’s self for the best tomorrow of the child.
Don’t forget that she spends quality time with her children, teaches them etiquettes and mannerism creates a feeling of self-respect in them, listens to them very minutely, praises and encourages them profusely, teaches them to handle frustration, developed morality, and becomes their support system.
An ideal mother we need is the image maker of her husband, the family, the community and the state at large. If all mothers are in-deed ideal there will be a lot of elimination of criminality, violence, insecurity, addiction to drugs, unwanted pregnancies etc.

 

Dick Unwonawaji

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Women

Nigerian Women And Dividends Of Democracy 

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Recently a gathering of women from all parts of Nigeria took place at Moshood  Abiola National Stadium in Lagos geared towards advancing women’s empowerment.
It was tagged: “10 Million Women Empowerment Mega Rally 2026”. It was a historic event.
 There was a full-capacity attendance at the rally, with not less than 100 participants from each of the 36 states of the federation, despite the significant logistical challenges and costs involved.
The theme was:  “10 Million Women, One Movement, One Voice, One Goal,” and was described by stakeholders as an unprecedented gathering in Nigeria’s history. The event marked a strategic shift from symbolic participation to substantive empowerment and representation of women at all levels.
During that event, the First Lady and wife of the Governor of Rivers State, Her Excellency, Lady Valerie Fubara’s dedication to women’s empowerment was rooted in a clear vision: to strengthen women’s economic independence, educational advancement, and leadership capacity, ensuring that no woman was left behind.
Her consistent display of compassion, humility and service to humanity, particularly to women at the grassroots, has set a benchmark for first ladies across the country.
The rally stood as a testament to the power of collective female mobilization.  She was described as a pillar of support for the advancement of peace, progress, and development among women.
The rally was to make a national impact and to have a strategic vision for Nigerian women.
In a keynote address at the rally, the National Convener of the  10 Million women empowerment mega rally initiative and Honourable Minister of Women Affairs, Hajia Imaam Sulaiman-Ibrahim, described the rally as a “defining moment”for Nigerian women and a transition from mere political participation to active leadership and influence.
The Minister outlined the initiative’s core objectives to include: Presentation of the Women’s Charter for National Development, to promote increased political and economic inclusion of women, Grassroots Integration Framework, to connect women’s groups across all 9,410 wards in Nigeria and tangible empowerment programmes, including the symbolic distribution of tricycles, hair dryers, and sewing machines to beneficiaries.
She reaffirmed the federal government’s commitment to placing economic resources directly in the hands of women through targeted interventions that create jobs, provide business support, and expand access to skills training.
The Minister also expressed appreciation to Nigeria’s First Lady, Senator Oluremi Tinubu, for her maternal leadership and unwavering support for the initiative, as well as to the wives of state governors whose contributions were instrumental to the programme’s success.
The 10 Million Women Empowerment Mega Rally 2026 signalled a new era where Nigerian women are not only participants in national development but active shapers of policy and progress.
That rally for me was not a mere one. I think that that rally may have been a kind of reminder to both the women and all stakeholders that women are prepared to get involved in politics when given the opportunity.
Such rally could also have served as an avenue to let the women know that they can.
During the  former President Olusegun Obasanjo’s tenure, women were represented in governance. Dr. Ngozi Okonjo-Iweala was the coordinating minister and minister of Finance and later served as minister of foreign affairs,  Dr. Obi Ezekwesili was minister of education. Late Dora Akunyili served as minister of information after serving as chair of National Agency for Food, Drugs Administration and Control (NAFDAC).
Boma Jack, a Rivers daughter, was the minister of culture and tourism under that administration.
Dr. Kema Chikwe was appointed minister of transport, minister of Aviation and Aerospace and later, National Women Leader of a political party, Peoples Democratic Party (PDP).
Rivers State has produced two powerful and qualified deputy governors, Dr. Ipalibo Harry-Banigo, who is currently representing Rivers South West Senatorial District. Another is Prof. Ngozi Nma Odu, the deputy governor of Rivers State.
Prior the 2015 electioneering period, the former First Lady of Nigeria, Dame Patience Jonathan, PhD, during each gathering of women would always go by their slogan: “Can we?” And women would say:”Yes we can”.
She championed the course of women attaining the 35% affirmative action. To a large extent, it was realistic. Women all over Nigeria were carried along in politics. Many states of the federation had female deputy governors.
There was a particular rally that brought women from every part of the country as they converged on Abuja. That rally had the likes of Prof Dora Akunyili  of blessed memory, Josephine Aneni, just to mention but a few.
I remember when late Akunyili said:”if a man is the chairman of a local government, a woman should be the vice. If a man is a governor, the woman should be the deputy, and so on. Their message then was clear. They clamoured for creation of appointive and elective positions for women in Nigeria.
Of course women can. Those who at one time or the other were given opportunity to vie for elective positions and or appointed into positions of authority have done well.
Many women became deputy governors, vice chairmen, some were elected into state Houses of Assembly, House of Representatives and the Senate.
Nkeiruka Onyejocha represented Isuikwuato/Umunneochi Federal Constituency of Abia State in the House of Representatives and  currently, Minister of State for Labour and Employment.
Uche Ekwunife was a member of House of Representatives and later represented and recently a Senator representing the people of Anambra Central Senatorial District.
Hon Blessing Onyeche Onuh was elected and is representing Otukpo/Ohimini Federal Constituency of Benue State in the House of Representatives.
Senator Natasha Apoti-Uduaghan,  represents Kogi Central Senatorial District. Her performance in representing her people is second to none. In fact, what she has done is worthy of emulation.
These and many are interested in participating in politics despite the knocks they receive from their counterparts.
Some stakeholders have come to say that Nigerian women at this time in history deserve full inclusion in politics rather than agitation for special seats in the National Assembly.
During the Pan Niger Delta Forum  (PANDEF) women conference that held in Yenagoa, recently,  women from the Niger Delta region were asked to demand total freedom to participate in politics because they do not deserve to be treated as second-class citizens.
What happens in other countries of the world can also happen in Nigeria as regards women.
Reports have it that women in Britain do not have special seats in parliament as well as America. Their own  system flows and recognises them, and women participate fully in politics. Nobody talks about special seats or women being under-privileged there. It can be done in Nigeria.
Nigerian women are very intelligent and are active in politics. They are also very active in their various professions. So, why are they asking for special seats?
Women across the world participate and become members of parliament, governors and presidents. Nigeria should not be an exception.  The system should cover women.
As elections are coming next year, efforts to get more women integrated in politics in Nigeria should be intensified.
 Bring in more women into governance either in the state executive, the state Houses of Assembly, House of Representatives and the Senate.
In  previous elections, there were situations where about 10 women would contest in various positions in some states, be it states or national assembly, but less than five of them would emerge winners.  Most of those positions are dominated by the males.
A lot of problems are hindering Nigerian women from full participation in politics. Some of the problems range from competition from the opposite gender since it is assumed that women are weaker in nature.
Sometimes, the problem is even coming from fellow women. Nigerian women need full  support and encouragement from their folks.
Family pressure is also one of the problems affecting women from participating fully in politics.
The quest for women’s participation in politics clearly means that women’s education does not end in kitchen.
As Nigeria marks 27 years in her return to democracy, it should be noted that women’s involvement and contribution can never be overemphasized.
Eunice Choko-Kayode
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Women

NAWOJ Seeks Partnership With Hotel Presidential On Summit

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The National Summit Planning Committee of the Nigeria Association of Women Journalists, NAWOJ, Rivers State Chapter has paid a courtesy visit to the Management of Hotel Presidential, Port Harcourt, to seek partnership for its forthcoming National Summit scheduled for 28th to 30th October, 2026.
The visit, led by the Chairperson, Nigeria Association of Women Journalists (NAWOJ) Rivers State Chapter, Susan Lekara Nwinee and the Chairperson of the Planning Committee, Comrade Uchenda Bibian Okogbule, took place last Tuesday, at the Hotel Presidential, Port Harcourt.
In her address, Okogbule said NAWOJ, the women’s wing of the Nigeria Union of Journalists, NUJ, is the umbrella body for all female journalists in Nigeria and the largest platform of women in media in West Africa.
“We are Storytellers, Truth-seekers, and Nation-builders. In Rivers State, our women are on the frontlines – reporting conflict, amplifying women’s voices and holding power to account. This morning, we come to you with a vision and a request for partnership,” she stated.
She said the 3-day National Summit, themed, “Empowering Women: Breaking Barriers, Shaping Change and Achieving A Sustainable Future: The Joy of Truth”, is expected to host over 5,000 women journalists, corporate leaders, editors, media owners, policymakers, development partners, entrepreneurs, civil society actors, and international delegates* from across the 36 States of Nigeria and beyond.
According to the Committee chairperson, the summit will interrogate critical issues including breaking glass ceilings in newsrooms, shaping constructive narratives, and ensuring women’s voices are heard and acted upon for national sustainability.
Okogbule noted that Hotel Presidential was selected based on three considerations namely, legacy, capacity, and partnership.
Her words: “This Hotel is Port Harcourt’s first 5-star address. It is a symbol of Rivers pride, excellence, and hospitality. Our national delegates deserve an iconic venue that matches the weight of our theme. We believe in ‘Rivers Women Supporting Rivers Institutions.”
She maintained that the he committee is seeking a sustainable partnership with Hotel Presidential in two key areas:  such as venue partnership: A concessionary rate or sponsorship of the main conference hall for the 3-day summit.
In return, she said Hotel Presidential would be branded as NAWOJ’s “Official Venue Partner” across all national platforms, banners, TV, radio, and press materials.
She said that NAWOJ was also seeking financial and kind support,  support for delegate welfare, refreshments, branding, or accommodation for out-of-state speakers, with partners’ logos listed as “Champion of Women.”
Her words: “Over 5,000 influential women will sleep, eat, meet, and post from Hotel Presidential. They will return to Lagos, Abuja, Kano, Enugu, among others, with stories of your excellence”.
The Committee appealed to the Hotel Management to support the initiative, noting that the partnership would position Hotel Presidential as the “home of change” and reinforce its reputation for hosting landmark national events.
“We have come with respect. We have come with a plan and we have come with faith that Hotel Presidential will say yes to Rivers women, yes to truth, and yes to a sustainable future,” she concluded.
The visit had in attendance members of Hotel Presidential Management, members of NAWOJ, Rivers State Chapter, led by the Chapter Chairperson, Susan Lekara Nwinee.
A copy of the Summit’s budget estimation was submitted to the Management for consideration.
Responding,  the Managing Director of the hotel Presidential, Rex Yaakpogoro, promised to partner with the association.
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Women

Nigerian Women And Dividends Of Democracy

Published

on

 Recently a gathering of women from all parts of Nigeria took place at Moshood  Abiola National Stadium in Lagos geared towards advancing women’s empowerment.
It was tagged: “10 Million Women Empowerment Mega Rally 2026”. It was a historic event.
 There was a full-capacity attendance at the rally, with not less than 100 participants from each of the 36 states of the federation, despite the significant logistical challenges and costs involved.
The theme was:  “10 Million Women, One Movement, One Voice, One Goal,” and was described by stakeholders as an unprecedented gathering in Nigeria’s history. The event marked a strategic shift from symbolic participation to substantive empowerment and representation of women at all levels.
During that event, the First Lady and wife of the Governor of Rivers State, Her Excellency, Lady Valerie Fubara’s dedication to women’s empowerment was rooted in a clear vision: to strengthen women’s economic independence, educational advancement, and leadership capacity, ensuring that no woman was left behind.
Her consistent display of compassion, humility and service to humanity, particularly to women at the grassroots, has set a benchmark for first ladies across the country.
The rally stood as a testament to the power of collective female mobilization.  She was described as a pillar of support for the advancement of peace, progress, and development among women.
The rally was to make a national impact and to have a strategic vision for Nigerian women.
In a keynote address at the rally, the National Convener of the  10 Million women empowerment mega rally initiative and Honourable Minister of Women Affairs, Hajia Imaam Sulaiman-Ibrahim, described the rally as a “defining moment”for Nigerian women and a transition from mere political participation to active leadership and influence.
The Minister outlined the initiative’s core objectives to include: Presentation of the Women’s Charter for National Development, to promote increased political and economic inclusion of women, Grassroots Integration Framework, to connect women’s groups across all 9,410 wards in Nigeria and tangible empowerment programmes, including the symbolic distribution of tricycles, hair dryers, and sewing machines to beneficiaries.
She reaffirmed the federal government’s commitment to placing economic resources directly in the hands of women through targeted interventions that create jobs, provide business support, and expand access to skills training.
The Minister also expressed appreciation to Nigeria’s First Lady, Senator Oluremi Tinubu, for her maternal leadership and unwavering support for the initiative, as well as to the wives of state governors whose contributions were instrumental to the programme’s success.
The 10 Million Women Empowerment Mega Rally 2026 signalled a new era where Nigerian women are not only participants in national development but active shapers of policy and progress.
That rally for me was not a mere one. I think that that rally may have been a kind of reminder to both the women and all stakeholders that women are prepared to get involved in politics when given the opportunity.
Such rally could also have served as an avenue to let the women know that they can.
During the  former President Olusegun Obasanjo’s tenure, women were represented in governance. Dr. Ngozi Okonjo-Iweala was the coordinating minister and minister of Finance and later served as minister of foreign affairs,  Dr. Obi Ezekwesili was minister of education. Late Dora Akunyili served as minister of information after serving as chair of National Agency for Food, Drugs Administration and Control (NAFDAC).
Boma Jack, a Rivers daughter, was the minister of culture and tourism under that administration.
Dr. Kema Chikwe was appointed minister of transport, minister of Aviation and Aerospace and later, National Women Leader of a political party, Peoples Democratic Party (PDP).
Rivers State has produced two powerful and qualified deputy governors, Dr. Ipalibo Harry-Banigo, who is currently representing Rivers South West Senatorial District. Another is Prof. Ngozi Nma Odu, the deputy governor of Rivers State.
Prior the 2015 electioneering period, the former First Lady of Nigeria, Dame Patience Jonathan, PhD, during each gathering of women would always go by their slogan: “Can we?” And women would say:”Yes we can”.
She championed the course of women attaining the 35% affirmative action. To a large extent, it was realistic. Women all over Nigeria were carried along in politics. Many states of the federation had female deputy governors.
There was a particular rally that brought women from every part of the country as they converged on Abuja. That rally had the likes of Prof Dora Akunyili  of blessed memory, Josephine Aneni, just to mention but a few.
I remember when late Akunyili said:”if a man is the chairman of a local government, a woman should be the vice. If a man is a governor, the woman should be the deputy, and so on. Their message then was clear. They clamoured for creation of appointive and elective positions for women in Nigeria.
Of course women can. Those who at one time or the other were given opportunity to vie for elective positions and or appointed into positions of authority have done well.
Many women became deputy governors, vice chairmen, some were elected into state Houses of Assembly, House of Representatives and the Senate.
Nkeiruka Onyejocha represented Isuikwuato/Umunneochi Federal Constituency of Abia State in the House of Representatives and  currently, Minister of State for Labour and Employment.
Uche Ekwunife was a member of House of Representatives and later represented and recently a Senator representing the people of Anambra Central Senatorial District.
Hon Blessing Onyeche Onuh was elected and is representing Otukpo/Ohimini Federal Constituency of Benue State in the House of Representatives.
Senator Natasha Apoti-Uduaghan,  represents Kogi Central Senatorial District. Her performance in representing her people is second to none. In fact, what she has done is worthy of emulation.
These and many are interested in participating in politics despite the knocks they receive from their counterparts.
Some stakeholders have come to say that Nigerian women at this time in history deserve full inclusion in politics rather than agitation for special seats in the National Assembly.
During the Pan Niger Delta Forum  (PANDEF) women conference that held in Yenagoa, recently,  women from the Niger Delta region were asked to demand total freedom to participate in politics because they do not deserve to be treated as second-class citizens.
What happens in other countries of the world can also happen in Nigeria as regards women.
Reports have it that women in Britain do not have special seats in parliament as well as America. Their own  system flows and recognises them, and women participate fully in politics. Nobody talks about special seats or women being under-privileged there. It can be done in Nigeria.
Nigerian women are very intelligent and are active in politics. They are also very active in their various professions. So, why are they asking for special seats?
Women across the world participate and become members of parliament, governors and presidents. Nigeria should not be an exception.  The system should cover women.
As elections are coming next year, efforts to get more women integrated in politics in Nigeria should be intensified.
 Bring in more women into governance either in the state executive, the state Houses of Assembly, House of Representatives and the Senate.
In  previous elections, there were situations where about 10 women would contest in various positions in some states, be it states or national assembly, but less than five of them would emerge winners.  Most of those positions are dominated by the males.
A lot of problems are hindering Nigerian women from full participation in politics. Some of the problems range from competition from the opposite gender since it is assumed that women are weaker in nature.
Sometimes, the problem is even coming from fellow women. Nigerian women need full  support and encouragement from their folks.
Family pressure is also one of the problems affecting women from participating fully in politics.
The quest for women’s participation in politics clearly means that women’s education does not end in kitchen.
As Nigeria marks 27 years in her return to democracy, it should be noted that women’s involvement and contribution can never be overemphasized.
Eunice Choko-Kayode
Continue Reading

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