Women

Wedding Ring: The Woman’s Symbol Only?

Published

10 years ago

October 10, 2014

No form of adorn
ment identifies the married. It’s the ring that tells.” These were the words of Mrs Evelyn Chidozie, a banker with Diamond Bank, when asked why she wears her wedding ring. This seems to suggest that every married man and woman should have his or her ring on, as a Proof of his/her status. Is it really the case?
As with other life’s achievements, marriage has its signs on the married and the common sign of identification is the wedding ring. Used as a pledged token of love for each other on the wedding day, the couple, thereafter, find it exciting wearing it.
With time however, it becomes practicable that the ladies are more prone to wearing their wedding rings than the men.
Ofcourse, they have no problem with this because, to them, there is every reason to do so. Putting on their wedding rings adds value to them, it gives them that sense of ‘having come of age’ and it serves as a protective measure against undue sexual harassment from some men out there.
“Once the wedding ring is on your finger, it puts the men off you. Though some will still want to attempt but the responsible ones will just let you be” Tonye Ibim said.
They also believe that the ring on their finger is a show of their commitment to their marriage relationship which helps to freshen the vows and encourage them in their marital functions and challenges.
While some ladies are of the view that the men could be exempted because of their nature and the fact that they are as frequently harassed as the ladies, some say however, that such exemption should not exist as they together made the vow on the wedding day.
They said “the ring is the outward physical sign of the marriage relationship and so, they should put it on and of course, if they are proud of their marriage. It also took the both of us to pledge that day using our rings so they should also fulfill their part.”
Thus, even against the men’s wish, some are compelled to wear their rings while some others will not just wear it no matter what, with the reason that it was just for the wedding day. The result some times is fracas in the home particularly when the couple are set for an outing.
When confronted as to why the absence of such excitement about the ring, these men’s response were obvious.
“The man by nature does not really attach more value to the marriage especially in our african setting. To him, it is not a big deal that he is not married but the case is different with the woman who has come of a marriageable age. So, the man is not too excited about the wedding ring,” Dr Jaja Sunju said.
As to the women’s accusation that such men do not cherish and love their wives or marriage relationships, Sunju said “not wearing the ring does not have anything to do with the level of your love for your wife. It’s just about value and what your view is on the wedding ring”.
Mr Koate Baribeop, a civil servant who is also not keen on wearing his wedding ring claims that “the women wear it because it gives them the feelings of ‘winner’. According to him, there are too many women that are competing to be chosen by men and when finally they are picked out of the lots, the ring is the symbol of celebration of her victory. But for the man, he has nothing to lose.”
Engr. Amachree Thompson said however, that the wearing of wedding ring has nothing to do in the marriage. To him “it makes no sense at all”. He countered that even for the women’s claims that it prevents sexual harassment, some women with their rings on crave for the harassment to show that they are still fresh and marketable.
He said “for me, wearing the ring does not really stop a woman or man who is married from being promiscuous. Infact, of recent, it’s like a licence. You could see a man and woman together at a joint and because they are both wearing their wedding rings, you simply take them to be husband and wife. Seeing such persons at odd places hardly gives you any negative impression when otherwise, there is a lot of questionable issues surrounding them on that outing. Infact, married couples are more into promiscuity than the unmarried ones and so, what’s the big deal about wearing the ring? It does not spell anything positive”.
But Iwan Ogolo, an Architect, has a different view and I describe him as the ‘friend of the woman’on this issue. To some, “marriage is an achievement and must be appreciated even if it entails wearing the ring. It keeps the memory of the relationship with me wherever I go. I should be proud of wearing my wedding ring to show that I am married and responsible to a family. The day I hurry out of the house forgetting my wedding ring, I feel incomplete. And on it goes”.
The wedding day is usually referred to as the woman’s day. This is so because that day, she attracts more eyes than the man. The reason also could not have been different but from the fact that she feels more honoured in every ramification. As it were, it is customary for every woman to be married to the extent that when the reverse is the case, she is tagged as being ‘wrong’.
So, when nature calls in this manner, keep up with whatever reawakens the excitement. Remember, as you dress your bed, so you lie on it. Your marriage is in your hands and regardless of whether or not your spouse puts on his ring, if yours gives you that feelings, try it on and remain committed to the vows you made at the very beginning, at least, to prove your worth in the world you are.

Lady Godknows Ogbulu

A typical wedding ring

Women

The Wise Woman

Published

14 hours ago

April 26, 2024

The Tide

The wise woman builds her home. Mothers are supposed to live exemplary lives. The roles of mothers in the building of the modern Christian home cannot be overemphasized.
The function of the mother is to help the man build the home. She is a helper. A helper to the husband when the man is not doing well. It is important for the wise woman to assist when the man is not able to meet up with the items needed in the home.
A wise woman needs to reference God first and then the husband. Also the wise woman should respect her husband.
Caring for her own children as well as others is very crucial.
Do not despise children from other mothers. Discipline the child who is going the wrong way.
Ensure family bonding, show love and don’t discriminate. Connection with children is very important, especially the females. Find out who is her friend. Also find out the kind of lives they live. Caution, counsel and guide so that they make good partners.
Teaching children the dos and donts should start from birth. Inculcate the word of God in them so that when they grow, will not depart from it.
From the Scripture, some women influenced their families positively. Virgin Mary influenced the world, she never destroyed herself hence she gave birth to Jesus Christ.
Elizabeth, despite her age, God blessed her as she waited patiently.
A wise should curb favouritism in the family and love children equally. Whether a child is your biological child or not, it is necessary to show love equally. Reprimanding the children should be the function of both man and wife.

Women

The Desire Of Every Woman In Marriage

Published

14 hours ago

April 26, 2024

The Tide

Marriage is beautiful when there is love. Before and after marriage, couples show love to themselves. But you discover that after some years, that same love turn to be something else. A lot of people start going through emotional trauma in the hands of their loved spouses.
There are many things the woman desires to keep the love on as far as marriage is concerned.
Women are blesssed with feminine abilities that can be used for good in husbands lives. With your abilities, you can create a marriage that will last till couples get old.
A woman needs
man that is honest, trustworthy, nice, loving and financially stable.
There are no two ways about finance in marriage. No matter the level of love, if there is no reasonable finance, it is always difficult to manage the home.
Referring to the Biblical belief in Genesis 3: “Your desire shall be unto you…….. “
What this means is that whatever the woman desires in life shall be provided as far as she performs her role in her home. There are many things the woman expects her husband to take care of.
A woman wants a husband that is not lazy, at least helping to do one or two things when he is at home.
A man that is educated and intelligent so that they will transfer such traits to their children.
Knowing that there are traits that her husband has, traits of taking care of people, giving freely to people and caring for her family. She expects him to exhibit them.
A woman wants to love a husband that has family interest at heart. A man that spends time with his family, remembering his family even as he is away from home.
No matter where he finds himself, he is not destracted by external influence. He returns home to his loved ones.
A woman should not antagonise her husband because of one error or the other. No matter the level of offence he may have committed, you still show some love.
According to the Scripture, it is with wisdom that a woman builds her home. As far as he rreturns home, you accept him as your own.
It is not as if the woman will not monitor her husband, but to certain limit. Don’t be a monitoring spirit. Don’t allow anything to take your joy.
Don’t loose trust in your husband. The idea of checking your husband’s phone should be discouraged. The more you check your husband and his phone, the more you loose your joy.
You can show some form of jealousy, but to an extent. Cooperation, respect and being honoured from time to time is what the woman desires.
The home should not be a battle ground for a woman and man. A woman should be able to ask herself if the check on her husband will pay her any good.
Draw a line to a point where you checkmate your husband’s activities.
A woman wants a man that will love her and telling her you love her will be all she desires.

Women

The Desire Of Every Woman In Marriage

Published

3 weeks ago

April 5, 2024

The Tide

A woman needs a man that is honest, trustworthy, nice, loving and financially stable.
There are no two ways about finance in marriage. No matter the level of love, If there is no money, it is always difficult.

Referring to the Biblical belief in Genesis 3:Your desire shall be unto you……..
That is one aspect the woman expects her husband to take care of.
A woman wants a husband that is not lazy, at least helping to do one or two things. A man that is educated and intelligent.
She knows that there is a trait that her husband has. Traits of taking care of people, giving freely to people and caring for her family.
A woman wants to love a husband that has family interest at heart. A man that spends time with his family, remembering his family even as he is away from home.
A woman should not antagonise her husband because of one error or the other. No matter the level of offence he may have committed, you still show some love.

According to the Scripture, it is with wisdom that the women builds her home.
It is not as if the woman will not monitor her husband, but to certain limit. Don’t be a monitoring spirit. Don’t allow anything to take your joy.
Don’t loose trust in your husband.
The idea of checking your husband’s phone should be discouraged. The more you check your husband and his phone, the more you loose your joy.

The home should not be a battle ground for a woman and man. A woman should be able to ask herself if the check on her husband will pay her any good.
Draw a line to a point where you checkmate your husband’s activities.
A woman wants a man that will love her and telling her you love her will be all she desires.