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Gossip: An Evil Many Enjoy

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Introduction

There is the saying that, “small minds discuss people; average minds discuss events; great minds discuss ideas.” Certainly a great number of people fall into the first category: small minds. They find it extremely difficult to hold their tongue. Once they sit among friends or a group, they discuss people. They malign, slander, castigate, backbite, lie, criticize, and assassinate others’ characters, with no qualms. In many it has ‘become a habit and comes quite impulsively that little thought is given to its malice.

Honestly, it is hard to find someone who does not enjoy discussing others, especially portraying them in a negative light. Even aged folks who are supposed to have been taught by life itself, and people who themselves have been victims cherish it as one would cherish wine. Yet I have never seen a person who wants to be discussed by others and portrayed in a negative light. At such one feels deeply hurt, and the following lamentation could ensue, “I am being misunderstood and misrepresented ….”

In a certain discussion a person commended somebody who was well known to be doing very well in an area of his profession. The other person retorted, “Don’t mind that, these people you think are doing very well are not really good people, if I should open my mouth now you will shudder.” The third person came up in support, “think of it when he was in [he mentions the place], what did he achieve? Nothing.” I was there. The last speaker was of same profession with the person they are talking about, and has also worked in some places. I said to him, “what about you, do you not realise that somebody else might be somewhere saying you never achieved anything in more than four years you stayed in the places you worked?” He felt shocked; recoiled to himself, noticing that he would not like it in the least if someone were to be somewhere passing on him the same judgment he was passing on another.

Had I not broken the ‘chain of gossip’ the victim would have been torn to shreds before the discussion was over. And those who perhaps are hearing about him for the first time would find it hard to ever take that person as somebody of any substance again. When they see him in the future they are most likely to view him from that negative and biased perspective unless any of them has trained himself so well in the art of not taking gossip seriously which I try to teach here. When it concerns you, you will not like it to be taken seriously but when it concerns another, your guess is as good as mine.

What is Gossip

The Encarta dictionary defines gossip as “conversation about personal or intimate rumours or facts, especially when malicious.” And the gossiper is “somebody given to spreading personal or intimate information about other people.” To gossip or gossiping means to “to tell people rumours or personal or intimate facts about other people, especially maliciously.” Thus gossip can be used both as a noun and as a verb even as an adjective, gossipy.

The Oxford Advanced Learners dictionary says it is “informal talk or stories ~bout other people’s private lives that may be unkind or not true.” The verb gossip means “to talk about other people’s private lives often in an unkind way.” A gossiper is “a person who enjoys talking about other people’s private lives.” Chambers English Dictionary defines the gossiper as “one who goes about telling and hearing news, or idle, malicious, and scandalous tales.” These however differ from gossip as “a form of news characterized by its reference to personalities and its uncertain origin and reliability …. “ which is not our concern here.

Thus gossip has to do with meddling in other people’s affairs, rumors or facts; but then maliciously told. It may be “unkind or untrue.” You will agree with me that one needs to be an unkind person to tell unkind stories. And there is a serious friction between the unkind and the true. The unkindness necessarily thwarts the facts.

The gossiper “enjoys talking about other people’s private lives” and of course when it is negative. In other words it pleases the gossiper to hear that other people have gone wrong. So he or she ‘goes about,’ ‘telling and hearing’ idle, malicious, and scandalous tales. Does this not suggest one who is evil at heart? It takes such a person to tell, idle, malicious tales and to enjoy telling them.

Why do People Love to Gossip?

There is no gainsaying the fact that many people love gossiping and even swim in it Christians and non Christians alike. They do not care to verify a story before they tell it. And then, it spreads, only later to be discovered by those who make some efforts to verify, as frame-up or lies, in most cases! One wonders whether some people still find any relevance in the passage of the Scripture which says, “Nobody who fails to keep a tight rein on the tongue can claim to be religious; this is mere self deception; that person’s religion is worthless” (James 1:26).

Many reasons can be proffered for which people love to gossip: one which lies hidden in the subconscious, is the fact that gossip seems a very cheap way of establishing relationship or even gaining acceptance. Since majority of people have small minds and can rarely rise above gossip in their discussions, to flow with them you need to resort to one form of gossip or another. And for sure, many dance to this. That is why gossipers have many friends or rather, customers. However the relationship is built on sand; soon it either grows into partnership in crime or is broken up by gossip among the gossipers.

Thus one of the strengths of gossip lies in the influence it has on the other person: it makes him feel the gossiper trusts him. This makes it very difficult for him to posit any doubt or outright contradiction of what he is being told. More often than not he panders to the tale, becoming an accomplice in the gossip, believing the tale and is ready to tell it to another: “they said … “ Meanwhile the two have now something in common at the expense of the person about whom they gossiped. This is why when the one who heard the gossip sees the person about whom he heard he holds him in low esteem, loathes him, looks down on him, etc; but he likes the one with whom he gossiped, and when he sees him he feels at ease with him, and greets him with smiles. Is gossip not powerful?

Secondly gossip has the tendency of making people look away from the faults and deficiencies of the gossiper but to concentrate on the person gossiped about. He or she becomes a suspect and every of his or her action susceptible to misinterpretation while the gossiper is left alone and often his or her faults and deficiencies condoned or neglected. It is like turning the searchlight on someone else. Often the gossiper is afraid that his or her faults are obvious and that of another not quite obvious, he or she points to another: this or that person has also this fault I have. I am not the only one involves in this. Often too the gossiper points to people who actually seem to be worse than him or her so that his or her own faults will be viewed as minor.

Being a form of self expression, one who gossips wants to express himself or herself to the other and possibly to win the other to his or her side – that is why the tale must be tailored to the cravings of the hearer. In this respect gossip could be as a result of insecurity, lack of self confidence, inferiority complex, etc. Thus, “the experience of envy” which often shows itself through gossip, “has been described as a consuming emotion in which ones weaknesses or flaws feel physically apparent. Low self-esteem, anxiety, hostility, depression or decreased self-efficacy may result.”

Gossip can also be caused by jealousy; what the same writer called, ‘Envying the Wicked,’ in his book, ‘The Desertion of God ….. ‘Here some people who think that they are doing better than others, but are not spiritually enlightened enough, consciously or unconsciously, feel that evil doers are enjoying what they do not enjoy – wrongly thinking evil as enjoyment -; jealousy creeps in. Their hearts grow bitter; they castigate them at the slightest opportunity. However this type of people are not truly steadfast. Most of them keep the law or God’s commandment merely out of the sense of decency. So it is not even that they avoid evil, they commit it more ‘responsibly,’ and perhaps not as much frequently. Another element in this, is pride. That is why you see some people who appear to be very good Christians but what comes out of their mouth against another is horrible.

Another reason why people like to gossip is because they are bitter in heart owing to the evil which lies hidden in them. Their eyes are therefore blurred. They hardly see any good in others; they hardly appreciate anything, and are hardly satisfied. This category of people is easily identified as they complain almost about everything. They carry their complaint about in search of support. Another element of this is that many people want everybody else to seem worse than they are or at least as bad as they are. You notice that people who are involved in certain evil are always eager to hear that another has committed such evil. They wouldn’t like to doubt it, it gives them some consolation. They go about spreading it.

The content of gossip is more often than not, character assassination, backbiting, castigation, etc. And when it has to do with colleagues, the element of envy comes into play. According to some researchers in the area of envy “it is easy to imagine how the nature of organizational life gives rise to frequent social comparisons that may give rise to envy.” By this they mean that social comparison is a fact. And it is almost always applied to people who work in a group, organization, Churches, parishes, institutions, etc.

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What to Look for in a Marijuana Smoking Device

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Though there are various ways to enjoy marijuana, smoking remains the most popular way to get high. This method also happens to have the most devices available.

When buying a smoking device, you must get a high-quality product. Not all apparatuses are made the same way and provide the same doses. Various studies prove that the device you use is equally important as the weed itself and can make the overall smoking experience better.

Buying a suitable smoking device is all about understanding your preferences and tailoring accessories accordingly.

The Main Types of Pipes

There are many ways for cannabis users to smoke marijuana. A hand pipe, also known as a dry pipe or bowl, is a convenient and easy method to smoke weed, especially for people who occasionally smoke. Featuring a small chamber, a hand pipe delivers harsher hits than other types of marijuana pipes.

On the other hand, a water pipe or a bong is ideal for experienced users. From small designs to large, water pipes, unlike hand pipes, contain specific chambers to hold water and deliver a smoother experience.

The one-hitter is a tiny and discrete pipe designed for a single inhalation or, as the name suggests, one hit. One-hitters are popular because they help users control the dosage of their marijuana intake.

And then, there are portable vape or vape pens that offer a smoke-free experience. Vape pens are a discreet way of getting your fix when on the go.

How To Choose A Good Dry Pipe

Whether you are looking to get high at home or while hanging out with friends, pipes make consuming cannabis much easier and quicker than packing blunts or rolling joints. As they are practical, every marijuana user must have at least one good dry pipe. With so many different pipes available at various price ranges, you should consider multiple factors to find a suitable dry pipe.

The first thing you should consider is size. The size directly translates to portability. For those who travel a lot, a pipe smaller in size might be ideal. In contrast, if you plan to use the dry pipe as a tabletop centerpiece, you might want something bigger.

Additionally, smoking pipes are made from different materials. While commonly made from glass, marijuana smoking pipes can also be made from wood, metal, or ceramic. Typically, glass pipes are the best option for marijuana smokers as you will be treated to smooth and flavorful smoke regardless of the strain.

You should also take into consideration your budget when looking to buy a marijuana dry pipe. Remember that a low price doesn’t always translate to a low-quality product. You will still be able to land some great deals if you look around.

How To Choose A Good Water Pipe

To find a good water pipe, size is the first thing you should consider. If you are passing the bong with your friends, a larger bong might be a better option. On the other hand, if it is for more personal use, choose a smaller one.

Secondly, think about the material. Cannabis users often prefer glass as it provides the cleanest and the purest-tasting hits. However, it can easily break and is usually pricey. So, for a rowdier situation, an acrylic water pipe might be a better option.

How To Choose A Good One Hitter

If you are looking to buy a one-hitter, the pipe’s material is the primary concern as one-hitters are all generally the same size. The material can affect flavor and durability, so you must choose wisely. The common materials used to make one-hitters are glass, acrylic, and metal.

One-hitters made from glass offer an unparalleled flavor, while those made from acrylic and metal can make the hit less flavorful.

Furthermore, one-hitters highlight various features like a removable bowl, self-ashing mechanism, design that allows for easier cleaning, and heat resistance.

How To Choose A Good Portable Vape

Unlike desktop vapes, portable vapes are easy to carry around and use discreetly. What’s more, they tend to be less expensive and versatile, making them an ideal option for beginners. When looking for a portable vape pen, you should consider if they are made for vaping dry herb or wax.

The next thing you should consider is battery life. This factor is vital if you are on the go without access to a device charger. A few vaporizers come with external batteries, while others have long battery lives.

Furthermore, you should consider things like temperature control and the type of heating—conduction or convection. Also, see if the vape pen is easy to clean or not. Lastly, look at the price. As you will be holding onto your vaporizer for a while, it is a good idea to invest in a quality product from a certified seller like WeedSmart, a Canadian marijuana dispensary.

Explore the Arena of Marijuana Smoking Devices

With a wide array of marijuana smoking devices available on the market, it might be daunting to decide the one that’s best for you. The right choice for you will depend on your needs and what you think might be the best for you. If you don’t like a specific device’s feel, you can always look for other options.

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Jack And The Beanstalk

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Once upon a time, there lived a poor widow and her son, Jack. One day, Jack’s mother told him to sell their only cow. Jack went to the market and on the way, he met a man who wanted to buy his cow. Jack asked, “What will you give me in return for my cow?” The man answered, “I will give you five magic beans!” Jack took the magic beans and gave the man the cow. But when he reached home,  Jack’s mother was very angry. She said, “You fool! He took away your cow and gave you some beans!” She threw the beans out of the window. Jack was very sad and went to sleep without dinner.
The next day, when Jack woke up in the morning and looked out of the window, he saw that a huge beanstalk had grown from his magic beans! He climbed up the beanstalk and reached a kingdom in the sky. There lived a giant and his wife. Jack went inside the house and found the giant’s wife in the kitchen. Jack said, “Could you please give me something to eat? I am so hungry!” The kind wife gave him bread and some milk.
While he was eating, the giant came home. The giant was very big and looked very fearsome. Jack was terrified and went and hid inside. The giant cried, “Fee-fi-fo-fum, I smell the blood of an Englishman. Be he alive, or be he dead, I’ll grind his bones to make my bread!” The wife said, “There is no boy in here!” So, the giant ate his food and then, went to his room. He took out his sacks of gold coins, counted them and kept them aside. Then,  he went to sleep. In the night, Jack crept out of his hiding place, took one sack of gold coins and climbed down the beanstalk. At home, he gave the coins to his mother. His mother was very happy and they lived well for sometime.
He climbed the beanstalk and went to the giant’s house again. Once again, Jack asked the giant’s wife for food, but while he was eating, the giant returned. Jack leapt up in fright and went and hid under the bed. The giant cried, “Fee-fifo-fum, I smell the blood of an Englishman. Be he alive, or be he dead, I’ll grind his bones to make my bread!” The wife said, “There is no boy in here!” The giant ate his food and went to his room. There, he took out a hen. He shouted, “Lay!” and the hen laid a golden egg. When the giant fell asleep, Jack took the hen and climbed down the beanstalk. Jack’s mother was very happy with him.
After some days, Jack once again climbed the beanstalk and went to the giant’s castle. For the third time, Jack met the giant’s wife and asked for some food. Once again, the giant’s wife gave him bread and milk. But while Jack was eating, the giant came home. “Fee-fi-fo-fum, I smell the blood of an Englishman. Be he alive, or be he dead, I’ll grind his bones to make my bread!” cried the giant. “Don’t be silly! There is no boy in here!” said his wife.
The giant had a magical harp that could play beautiful songs. While the giant slept, Jack took the harp and was about to leave. Suddenly, the magic harp cried, “Help master! A boy is stealing me!” The giant woke up and saw Jack with the harp. Furious, he ran after Jack. But Jack was too fast for him. He ran down the beanstalk and reached home. The giant followed him down. Jack quickly ran inside his house and fetched an axe. He began to chop the beanstalk. The giant fell and died.
Jack and his mother were now very rich and they lived happily ever after.
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Dry Skin, Chafing

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With the harmattan season drawing closer, there is the need for ladies particularly to become sensitive to their skins in terms of applications in the most natural ways in order to overcome the season and remain radiant and attractive. Here are some tips for you.
Symptoms: The skin is evenly dry and there can be a tendency to chafing (more so during this period).
There is both water and oil loss in the skin. This may seem to be a matter of little concern but it can be a sign of more serious problems like essential fatty acide deficiency that can result in cardiovascular disease such as stroke, heart attack etc.
Dry Skin can also be a sign of an underactive thyrond.
If you are supplementing with Vitamin A in amounts over 100,000 units daily, dry skin may be the first warning of overdose. It is dangerous to take too much of vitamin A.
Natural Remedies:
Diet and Nutrients –
*Eat a nutritious diet of vegetables, fruit, grains, seeds, legumes and nuts. High sulfur foods like garlic, onions and asparagus help keep the skin smooth and youthful.
*Avoid animal fats, hydrogenated oils and fried foods
*The situation to this problem is not superficial creams which contain Vaseline or aluminum but obtaining enough unsaturated fatty acids in the diet. These would be uncooked vegetable oils, such as wheat germ oil, corn oil, seseme seed oil and soy oil. Take additional Vitamin E Supplementation of about 800-1,200 units a day.
*If you are not taking supplemental Vitamin A, begin taking a moderate amount (not over 25,000 units a day for a few days. Carrot juice (or 15 mg beta carotene daily) will also help.
*Take a B-Complex Supplement, Vitamin C (1,000mg 2-3 times) daily and zinc (15mg daily).
Applications:
*’Misting’ is helpful. Spray your face with a fine mist of water atleast three times a day. To increase the effect, add some aloe Vera to the mist water.
If you do, you must not spray into the eyes.
*For your shower, rinse off every day with lukewarm water using as little soap as possible. Do not use hot water.
*For itchy skin, add vinegar to the bath water and take two tablespoon of vegetable oil daily. Helpful herbs include yarrow, violet and margoram. Dry-brush message your skin, to tone it up.
*Add two to three drops of lavender essential oil to warm water and apply a warm compress to your face.
This will hydrate the skin and stimulate the water and oil glands.
*Ripe, mashed avoicado alone or mixed with ripe banana is an excellent moistening mask. It will deep over the throat and face (except the eye area). Wait 10-15 minutes, then rinse off.
*Drink an adequate amount of water and keep the house or room cooler.

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