Handling teenage girls have always been a problem because most of them cannot separate their left from their right. As minors, they interact with the opposite sex inappropriately without being aware of the consequences.
Some adults claim that young women go after them. A lot of havoc has occurred where female teenagers are impregnated by either their teachers or neighbours.
It is worisome to see a female child being impregnated by unknown person despite all the expenses on that young woman’s education. That kind of situation can ruin the girl’s future if not properly handled.
Many parents at one time or the other have raised the alarm about harassment of their children but became helpless when unwanted pregnancies occur. Many are of the view that such scenarios should be discouraged.
A school teacher, Marian Udoh, said that charity begins at home and that parents should start teaching their female children from the age of two. She noted that parents should inculcate in the children the habit of opposite sex of same parents not bathing together.
She said that due to the intelligence exhibited by children of nowadays, that it is important to teach them the ‘dos’ and ‘don’ts’.
She maintained that the teaching should be balanced in a way that while you teach the female children about inappropriate advances and attitudes, the schools should also teach and stressed that good behaviour should be imbibed in children.
According to her, churches should not be left out in teaching and inculcating good morals into the children while it should be continuous.
Mrs Udoh advised that parents should be proactive in dealing with inappropriate interaction with teenage girls.
A pharmacist, Ike Maxwell, said that conversation between a tutor and a school girl should end in the class and that even after class hours, it should just end at exchanging greetings.
He recalled that while in his place of primary assignment during the National Youth Service Corp (NYSC), some of the school girls made advances to him but he resisted and became friendly with a female Corp member.
A teacher, Monday Gom, said parents should be able to educate teenagers on the consequences of making advances at males. He said even when some of his female students harassed him, he never fell into their hands since he was aware of the consequences.
According to him, any interaction between a student and a tutor should be in the staff room where other teachers are present and not in enclosed environment.
He said a situation where a teacher and a student are found in enclosed environment, there is the likelihood of any form of harassment. He said school managers should keep their eyes on teachers especially in schools where you have crowd.
His words: “Adults should not take advantage of the naive nature of some of the minors and so should look out there where there are many ladies.”
Mr. Loveday Okocha asked: “What about the female parents?” He said the home where the parents reside should be the breeding ground where the parents should teach the girl-child the dos and don’ts.
He described the home as the starting point and platform where the mother is the head, who should teach the girls what is right.
At home level, she said parents should be able to know what girls need since that is where everything germinates and the kind of communication which takes place amongst them matters a lot.
According to him, schools should engage counsellors who from time to time teach the girls what to do and it takes the likes of God-fearing teachers to resist such offers from teenagers.
A legal practitioner, Mike Oghenedo, said nothing can be done as far as the law is there to checkmate. He said the current generation is one in which the children have been taught to be outspoken.
He said instead of attaining age 18, which is the consent age, teenagers nowadays start expressing themselves below the age and wondered why the senior ones who are more mature and know the law, who may not want to be imprisoned, who know that the future is brighter and take better decisions still misbehave.
As he puts it: “The tendencies are there before some of the minors turn 18”.
A public servant, Amos Joe, said despite parents, uncles and aunts should be able to speak the truth to the young ones.
In his words “When your conscience is dirty, you are defeated and have nothing to say”.
He recalled an African adage which says: “it takes a whole community to raise a child”. He advised that uncles should interact with the teenagers at home so that when they are outside, they know what to say or do and stressed that the female children should be equiped with the right information.
A head teacher, Mary Igwe, said parents should be involved in the process because as a parent, you know how the child relates with the teacher.
She suggested that schools should domesticate laws that will punish school teachers who may have unnecessary intimacy with students.
Her words: “School managers should be admonishing to pupils and students in the devotion every morning on how to relate with male teachers”.
When we talk about inappropriate interaction, it is just discipline on the part of the bigger person. Interaction can take place depending on the topic and there should be limit to it. Parents should not be careless about their girl-children.
Some responsible teachers over time have complained about female students harassing them and that at the end of the day, they got it hot.
Apart from legislation and laws, reduction of inappropriate interaction amongst teenagers and minors seems to be difficult but there are things that should be done to curb it.
Teachers should communicate with students based on academics only in schools and upto their houses.
Parents should be close to their daughters and monitor them so that they can open up when they are molested.
Years back, it was hard to see teenagers being molested or harassed by school managers as some of them married their school girls on a normal ground unlike these days.
Really it is worisome to see and hear that a girl in a high school is allegedly harassed and impregnated by a tutor who may not get her married at the end of the day.
Since parents cannot know and see what their wards do always, they should have close relationship with their children while school operators continue to sensitise minors day by day.
By: Eunice Choko-Kayode
NGO Urges Edo Women To Mitigate GBV
A Non-Governmental Organisation (NGO), Global Women for Quality and Sustainable Development Initiative (GWSD) has urged women in leadership positions in Edo State to use their various offices to mitigate Gender-Based Violence (GBV) in the society.
Executive Director of GWSD, Mrs Mariam Kadiri-Ezolome, stated this during a capacity building on stimulating women for leadership positions, held in Benin on Monday.
The Tide’s source reports that the training was aimed at mitigating GBV through protection.
Kadiri-Ezolome said GBV would be alleviated in the society, if more women were empowered and speak out against it.
“As women leaders, you should relate more with women at the grassroots; know what they are going through and see that they are empowered to bridge the gender gaps in the society.
“Women leaders should give other women, especially at community level, the voice to speak out against GBV.
“Also, some women don’t know what GBV is and as women in leadership, it is expected that we create awareness about it,” she said.
Speaking on violence against women during elections, the Founder, Echoes of Women in Africa, Mrs Louisa Eikhomun-Agbonkhese, said that electoral violence were mostly targeted at women and girls, thus preventing them from exercising their franchise.
Eikhomun-Agbonkhese added that women were sometimes scared to speak out against GBV in the political space due to fear of the leadership structure.
In her remarks, Executive Director, Women, Youths and Children Advancement Programme, Mrs Agatha Osieke, said women should equip themselves with relevant skills to enable them rise above GBV.
“You should know what you are seeking for: that you want to bring positive change. You need relevant skills, research, negotiation, listening and more.
“Women need to come up with a roadmap to change the narrative that women are not ready to hold political positions,” she said.
The source reports that GWSD is a non-profit organisation dealing with issues concerning women, youths and people in the community.
The group also provides varied services, geared toward improving the quality of life of its beneficiaries for sustainable development.
The source also reports that the capacity building was organised by GWSD and funded by European Union, in partnership with Agent for Citizens Driven Transformation, through the British Council.
Coping With Pregnancy In Married Young Woman
After marriage ceremonies, healthy couples pray for babies to come as they are referred to be fruits of marriage. Children also are source of joy to families. Although it is not a war zone when children do not come after marriages.
Young mothers need to adequately understand the various stages in pregnancy and how to go through the stages with minimum anxiety to be able to give birth to healthy babies.
They also need to know how to take proper care of the babies when they are born.
Pregnancy starts when conception occurs. Every pregnancy comes with its peculiarities. When pregnancy occurs, the woman notices many changes in her body.
As a young woman, the monthly period ceases, while breasts become full, firm and nipples become large and darker.
There is a likelihood of experience nausea or morning sickness lie, early discomfort, frequent pouring of saliva and sometimes vomiting. The woman also experiences sleeping excessively in the morning. Loss of appetite sometimes comes up when a woman becomes pregnant.
When a woman becomes pregnant as it is confirmed by a gynecologist, it is necessary that she attends antenatal care in a hospital. It is also known as prenatal care, which is given to the pregnant woman and the unborn child.
Experts say the importance of this is to ensure that the pregnant woman and the unborn child receive proper medical care to prepare them for safe delivery.
During the antenatal care period, the pregnant woman is made to undergo certain tests such as urine and blood, blood pressure and weight check, abdominal examination and pelvic assessment.
The advantages of antenatal care cannot be over emphasized as the mother-to-be is given all necessary medical treatments required for her safety of the unborn baby.
During antenatal care, complications are detected early and remedies are provided.
Maternity personnel like the midwives and staff nurses give adequate training on what to expect during delivery especially by young women who may be new to it.
The kinds of food to be consumed by the expectant mothers are normally identified, even the types of cloths to put on.
The kind of clothes a pregnant woman puts on also matters. \it is good to avoid all those tight jeans trousers around the waist. Maintaining good hygiene becomes necessary so that both the mother and the child will be free from diseases.
When a woman is delivered of a newborn, medical experts advise that she attends postnatal care, that is the care that the mother and her baby attends for medical check-up for six weeks.
Pregnancy is associated with some common problems. Constipation in which defecation is not frequent and sometimes passing of faces is hard. The problem is increased by the pressure on the lower abdominal region caused by enlarged uterus.
Heartburn is another problem associated with pregnancy. It is the passage of small amount of stomach contents into the lower part of the digestive tract. It is caused by enlarging uterus pressing against the stomach.
Some pregnant women experience leg cramps at night. It is experienced more at the late stage of the pregnancy.
Nausea and vomiting are the commonest which a lot of women suffer during pregnancy.
In some women, it stops after about three months. Weight gain comes up for some. But expert’s advice for regular weight check-up so that it doesn’t become excessive.
Some items needed for the care of new born: toiletries for mother and child, feeding tools if need be, spoons and cups, sanitary towel for mother.
Mother’s brassiere, night wears, bedspread for both mother and child.
The baby needs things such as vest, pars of socks, sweater, cap, napkin and diaper.
During the postnatal care, doctors examine the nursing mother to ensure that she is okay.
Such things as her weight, urine, blood pressure and blood haemegblobin are checked. There have been cases here after delivery, some mothers experience swollen legs. The baby alongside the mother is also examined.
By: Eunice Choko-Kayode with agency report
Edo Women’s Group Wants Automatic Tickets For Female Aspirants
An Edo Women’s Group, Edo Women in Politics (EWP), has canvassed that automatic tickets be given to all female aspirants in all parties, who have declared interest in any elective position.
This is contained in a statement, in Benin, by Mrs. Eunice Dawodu, Coordinator of the group.
Dawodu said it is hypocritical to give free nomination forms or forms at reduced prices to female aspirants and then still subject them to contesting with their male counterparts during primaries.
She particularly called on the People’s Democratic Party (PDP), being the ruling party in Edo, to take the lead by giving automatic tickets to all female aspirants who have passed the party’s screening.
“Giving the women free forms is not enough because they are still subjected to competing with their male counterparts and in the process, many of them still lose out.
“The PDP, being the ruling party in Edo, should take the lead in this campaign by granting automatic tickets to all their female aspirants and in areas where they are more than one, the primary election should be conducted within them.
“This request has become necessary because it has been discovered that women who dare to aspire are usually overwhelmed during the primary election by their male counterparts who most times have access to more resources, especially finance.
“The essence of the 36 per cent affirmative action is to encourage more women into politics and if it continues this way, it’s essence will be defeated,” she said.
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