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Authority: Tool For Good Child Upbringing

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Exercising of authority involves keeping a close check on a child to be able to trim his or her excesses. Discipline is one of the tools employed in this instance.

It has become glaring that “children brought up by loving but authoritative parents, such that are supportive of their children, yet maintain firm limit, excel academically, develop better social skills, feel good about themselves and are happier than children whose parents are either too lenient or excessively harsh” according to Parents Magazine

From babyhood through teenage, children are known to challenge daddy and Mummy’s right to exert authority over them. This accounts for why they quickly exploit any avenue that exposes the parents’ weakness to show their own supremacy. However, standing up to your feet to impress it on them that you remain the boss of the house, cows them down.

Never mind that you’ve got to be firm to your loved child, that you will alienate him or crush his spirit if you exercise your authority, No! You can exercise your authority without becoming a tyrant. The policy of disciplining with one hand and drawing closer with another will help a great deal, in love, let the child know why he is being disciplined.

In defining the family rules and the need to enforce them promptly; children though are small, they have their minds and desires, besides, they have an inborn tendency to sin.

These traits must be vehementaly challenged by designing rules and consequences and making sure that the later is upheld promptly for without that it is difficult to achieve your aim. Never for any reason relax in punishing any contravener, ofcourse that must be done in a calm, firm and consistent manner. If you are highly angry, wait for your anger to calm down before you administer any disciplinary action otherwise, you may do it wrongly.

Establishing and maintaining routines must not be handled with levity. Living in a time when people are deeply engrossed in their pursuit of material wealth, it becomes obviously difficult to maintain this aspect of parenting.

However, it takes discipline and determination on the part of the adult to do it. Routines are a major part of adult life. Work, worship and even recreation usually follow set rountine.

The children become handicapped when they are not exposed to structuring their time and taught to stick to a schedule.

Studies also show that having rules and structures makes a child feel safe and secure and teaches self-control and self-reliance.

Children by their nature, like freedom and total freedom we are told, potend danger, so,to eat, when to sleep day and night), when to study and when to go for recreation.

This must be closely monitored to ensure full compliance.

Acknowleding your child’s feelings: Every child no doubt expresses his feeling and emotions in one way or the other. Parents must create the impression that children are humans too that deserve attention, they need to be heared and attended to accordingly.

However, when negative feelings or emotions are expressed, parents must wisely and gently convince them to drop or discard such negative feelings.

Children are easily wary of parents who habitually contradicts them when their feelings are expressed. They will be less likely to open up to them as well as start doubting their ability to feel and think for themselves.

Above all, every parent must endeavour to be a role model. Copying parents is “one of the most powerful ways that children learn”, says Dr. Sal Severe, an author, what the parent verbally tells the children does not impact half as much as their action does on the them hence the need to always do what is right before them.

Parents must appologise to their children when they are at fault. This teaches the child to also say “I’m sorry” when he contravenes. You are under the watchful eyes of your children, so, be wise!

 

Sylvia ThankGod Amadi

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Women

‘It Is Time To End Violence Against Women’

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While pervasive, gender-based violence may seem to appear inevitable in our own clime, African Women Lawyers, Rivers State Chapter, believe that it can and must be prevented. To them, stopping this violence starts with believing survivors, adopting comprehensive and inclusive approaches that tackle the root causes, transforming harmful social norms, and empowers women and girls.
With women and girls living in danger around the world owing to conflict, climate-related natural disasters, food insecurity and human rights violations, which in turn exacerbate violence against women, this great body of women lawyers have decided to raise their voice against all shades of violence against women whether it be domestic or official
In pursuant of their aims and objectives, AWLA commemorate land mark dates set by the African Union and United Nations to raise awareness about the plight of women and children.
As the world engages in 16 Days of Activism Against Gender-Based Violence, the body avails itself the opportunity to highlight some violent and of course harmful practices Nigerian women are continually subjected to, as well as condemn such and create the awareness among the populace that perpetrators of such inhumane acts on a folk that deserves and desires protection in all spheres, will receive a bang of the law.
This year, AwLA is using the window provided by the United Nations via the 16 Days of Activism Against Gender-Based Violence, to contribute their own quota especially as it relates to condemning in concrete terms, societal practices that run foul to the healthy development of the women.
Activities outlined in commemorate of the 2021 version of the 16 days of activisms against gender based violence include; advocacy and sensitization visits to Khana Local Government and Oginigba in  Obio/Akpor Local Government on 26th and 30th November respectively while free legal clinic takes place in Port Harcourt Local Government on 29th of November.
While the program lasts, stakeholders are expected to brainstorm on how to solve the challenges faced by women, while women will be enlightened on their right as well as be sensitized on how to seek redress.
In a chat with The Tide woman Editor, Sylvia ThankGod-Amadi, the Coordinator of the African Women Lawyers Association, Hilda Desmond-Ihekaire, said her association is quite proactive on issues that bother on women and children’s rights.
She encouraged women to speak out against injustice meted on them by people who are supposed to protect their interest, stating that the era of accepting every awkward treatment against them is over. She enjoined them to avail themselves the opportunity of the free legal clinic provided at this season to vent out their grievances.
The AWLA coordinator revealed that her association is already handling matters of gender based violence in court at the moment and would stop at nothing until the public comes to appreciate that women are also human that should not be treated unjustly.
AWLA is a group of women lawyers with the aim and objective of protecting the right and interest of women and children in Africa. They do this through multi facetted approach, using advocacy, sensitization campaign and probono litigation services on women and children’s issues
16 Days of Activism Against Gender-Based Violence is an international campaign to challenge violence against women and girls. The campaign runs every year from 25 November, the International Day for the Elimination of Violence against Women, to 10 December, Human Rights Day.

By: Sylvia ThankGod-Amadi

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Women

NAWOJ Moves To Check Violence Against Women, Girls … Seeks More Action, Resources

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Chairman, Nigeria Association of Women Journalists (NAWOJ), Rivers State Chapter, Susan Serekara-Nwikhana, has called for strengthened actions and resources to address violence against women and girls in the society.
Speaking to newsmen in Port Harcourt, yesterday, November 25, 2021 to commemorate this year’s 16-Days of Activism, with the theme: ‘Orange the world: End Violence Against Women Now’, the Chairman, NAWOJ, Rivers State Chapter stated that violence against women and girls reached pandemic proportion especially during the COVID-19 hit that resulted to lockdown.
Serekara stressed that as lockdown measures were implemented to stop the spread of the coronavirus, violence against women, domestic violence intensified as school closures and economic strains left women and girls poorer, out of school and out of jobs, making them more vulnerable to exploitation, abuse, forced marriage, and harassment.
“We believe  that ending violence against women will require strengthened actions by the government through more investment in women and girls,” she said, regretting that formal reports of domestic violence have decreased, yet survivors find it harder to seek help and access support through the regular channels. She further noted that the 16 days of activism is an expression that gender-based violence though not inevitable, can and must be prevented.
“While gender-based violence can happen to anyone, anywhere, some women and girls are particularly vulnerable – for instance, young girls  and teenage girls who are employed as house helps . Violence against women continues to be an obstacle to achieving equality, development, peace as well as to the fulfillment of women and girls’ human rights,” Serekara added.

By: Susan Serekara-Nwikhana

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Women

NAWOJ Seeks Adequate Protection, Provision For Children

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Aware of the numerous problems children face especially with the current harsh economy of our nation, the Nigeria Association of Women Journalists (NAWOJ), Rivers State has stressed the need to protect the lives of children while investing in their future.
The association said this during this year’s commemoration of “The Universal Children’s Day”, that had “investing in our children means investing in our future”, as its theme.
This was contained in a statement signed by the association’s Chairman and Secretary, Mrs Susan Serekara-Nwikhana and Dr Ngozi Anosike, respectively.
The statement described the essence of the day as a time to improve the welfare for all children.
“NAWOJ is using this special day to call on governments at all levels to ensure that every child is given the means requisite for its normal development, both materially and spiritually, while cautioning parents against reproducing the number of children they cannot properly care for but give them out at their tender ages as house helps thereby exposing them to all forms of abuse.
“NAWOJ appreciates the fact that to invest in our nation requires that the child that is hungry is fed, the child that is sick nursed, the child that is backward helped, the delinquent child reclaimed, and the orphan and the unsheltered are secured”.
It commended the Governor of the State, Chief Nyesom Wike for ensuring that the Rehabilitation Centre at Iriebe is operating at optimum capacity.
NAWOJ recalls that during the commissioning of the rehabilitation Centre, Governor Wike magnanimously doled out N250million to the ministry of social welfare, just to ensure regular power supply and smooth running of the facility, a gesture NAWOJ appreciates so much as it translates to giving the children a sense of belonging.
The association also stressed the need to save the lives of new born babies in maternity homes and hospitals and called on Port Harcourt Electricity Distribution Company to as a matter of necessity ensure regular power supply to those facilities.
The association in the statement regretted the death of premature children in the Intensive Care Unit of OPM Free Hospital at Aluu axis of the State as a result of power outage.
“Universal Children’s Day, celebrated annually on the 20th of November, is not just a day to celebrate children for who they are, but to bring awareness to children that have experienced violence in forms of abuse, exploitation, and discrimination”, the statement added.

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