Connect with us

Women

Empowering The Girl Child

Published

on

Girls were taught to cook, to take care of the family, and then married off. Studying was off-limits to girls.
In those times, there lived a girl. She was a little different. She always had lots of questions in her mind.
When she was little, her mother wanted her to learn cooking.
The girl asked her mother, “Why should I learn to cook?”
Mother said, “So that you can feed yourself when required.”
The girl said “Fair enough”, and learned to cook.
After some time, her mother wanted to teach her household work.
The girl again asked, “Why?”
Mother said “So that you can be self-dependent.”
The girl said “Fair enough!”, and she learned the household chores.
Then one day, her parents told her that they will be marrying her off soon.
She asked, “Why?”
“Because all girls get married at this age.” Said the parents
“Everyone does, and so should I? That’s not a good reason. I am not going to get married.”
The girl’s determination surprised her parents. Other parents could have forced the girl into marriage, but her parents didn’t.
So, now the girl had enough time in hands. As her father was a teacher, she joined her father’s academy. There she learned several hymns and their meanings. She asked her questions and learned even more. Soon, she surpassed her father in knowledge.
One day, an invitation arrived. It was from the king. The invitation was for the brightest scholar in the academy. As it happened, the king wanted to compile all the knowledge in the universe into books. To get the inputs, he had invited scholars and philosophers from all over the world.
There was a discussion in the academy about who to send for this conference. After a lot of thought, they all agreed that the girl is the brightest scholar in the academy. So, the girl was sent to the conference.
When the girl reached the conference venue, she was taken aback by the grandeur. She noticed a large number of men, but hardly any women among the delegates.
She climbed the Dias to take her seat. Suddenly, there was huge uproar — people in the audience were staring at her.
“A woman, who thinks she can sit on the scholars’ panel?The King
“Preposterous!” Screamed someone.
“Look at her clothes, so provoking. I don’t think she is female of good reputation.” declared another.
“Stop her! It’s a sin against god.”
Everybody looked at the king for a solution.
The king pondered for a moment.
“Girl, there is some misunderstanding. A woman can’t sit on the scholars’ panel, unless she is accompanied by a man.”
“Pardon me, Your Grace! But I was invited to join the discussion.” Said the Girl.
“I don’t remember inviting you.” said the King.
“You sent the invitation for the brightest scholar in my academy. I am the brightest in my academy. On the invite there was nothing about only male scholars being allowed.” Answered the girl.
The king gave little chuckle.
“You have made a good point. I have no objection.” Said the king.
“But I don’t think a woman can join the discussion.” Murmured one of the women in the audience.
“Why?” Asked the girl.
“You will not feel comfortable around so many men” answered another woman .
“I have no problem — my focus is on my work, not men”.
“You don’t have to do this. You are not bad looking, you can marry some wealthy gentleman.” advised one elderly.
The girl ignored him.
“Let us have a discussion. If the scholars have objections, they can debate with her. If she wins, she can join the panel.” Said the king.
Several liked the solution. They were sure that the girl will be humiliated by scholars.
The scholars on the Dias discussed among themselves, and selected an elderly scholar as their representative.
“So, by joining the discussion, what you want to prove? That women are better than men?” Asked the elderly scholar.
“No, sir. I don’t want to prove anything. I am here to join the discussion, to quench my thirst for the knowledge. Like all of you.” Said the girl, fearless fearlessly.
“But greater knowledge is not for women.” Said the elderly scholar.
“I beg your pardon, sir, but why?” Asked the girl.
“Because female intellect is weaker than men.” Said the elderly scholar.
“Says who, sir?”
“It is written in the hymns.”
“May I ask, who wrote those hymns?”Asked the girl.
“The hymns were written by our forefathers.” Said the elderly scholar.
“By forefathers you mean, our male ancestors?” Asked the girl, again.
“Yes, of course. By our male ancestors.” Said the elderly scholar.
“How did our forefathers know that women have weaker intellect?”
“They noticed” said the elderly scholar, irritated.
“But how, my lord? Give me an example, how did they notice?” asked the girl again.
“I don’t remember.” Said the elderly scholar.
“Doesn’t matter. Why don’t any of you scholars ask me questions to prove my weaker intellect.”
Many scholars thought of asking her questions, but feared seeing her immense confidence.
“You ask too many questions, girl!” shouted the elderly scholar. He was furious.
The atmosphere was tense.
“Sir, answer her. Why is a female’s intellect weaker than a male’s?” said the king.
“I need to study, Your Grace, to come up with an example.” Said the elderly scholar.
“Then I can’t stop her from joining the scholars’ panel. She has come here on her own merit. I will allow her to sit on the panel until you come up with a convincing example” said the king.
People were still doubtful about girl’s worthiness. But as the discussion progressed, all doubts vanished.
Days passed. The girl took part in several discussions, asked many questions and answered many others. Other scholars were astonished by her brilliance.
When the final draft of the book was compiled, many hymns which were composed by the girl were included.
At the end, everybody agrees that the girl “who asked why” became the first female scholar.
Mehta is an expert on children’s issues.

 

Shon Mehta

Continue Reading

Women

The Desire Of Every Woman In Marriage

Published

on

A woman needs a man that is honest,  trustworthy,  nice,  loving and financially stable.
There are no two ways about finance in marriage. No matter the level of love, If there is no money,  it is always difficult.


Referring to the Biblical belief in Genesis 3:Your desire  shall be unto you……..
That is one aspect  the woman expects her husband to take care of.
A woman wants a husband that is not lazy,  at least helping to do one or two things.   A man that is educated and intelligent.
She knows that there is a trait that her husband has.  Traits of taking care of people,  giving freely to people and caring for her family.
A woman wants to love a husband that has family interest at heart. A man that spends time with his family,  remembering his family even as he is away from home.
A woman should not antagonise her husband because of one error or the other. No matter the level of offence he may have committed, you still show some love.


According to the Scripture, it is with wisdom that the women builds her home.
It is not as if the woman will not monitor her husband, but to certain limit.  Don’t be a monitoring spirit.  Don’t allow anything to take your joy.
Don’t loose trust in your husband.
The idea of checking your husband’s phone should be discouraged. The more you check your husband and his phone, the more you loose your joy.


The home should not be a battle ground for a woman and man.  A woman should be able to ask herself if the check on her husband will pay her any good.
Draw a line to a point where you checkmate your husband’s activities.
A woman wants a man that will love her and telling her you love her will be all she desires.

Eunice Choko-Kayode

Continue Reading

Women

What Women Want In Yet-To -Be Husbands

Published

on

What women want in their yet-to- be husbands matters a lot as far as marriage is concerned.
A woman desires a good fnancial prospect. Interestingly, some modern women place a man’s financial potential as more desirable than they have in the past.
Many decades ago, women ranked it lower on the list. It still comes in after items like love and maturity, but perhaps today’s women realise that a good economic partner is good husband material.
Good health has been an important characteristic for women through the 20th century and remains so these days. One might argue that because we’re living even longer, health plays a huge role in the success of a marriage. Women are anxious to know that their partners are healthy to be able to run the family together.
You discover that in most faith based organisations, would- be couples are mandated to go for medical tests to ascertain their health status as it concerns HIV/AIDS, Genotype and other related ones. This according to stakeholders is to ensure that couples raise healthy families.
Ambition has become less important to women over time, though it still being considered even if women nowadays are thriving in the workforce competing with the male folk. It may be because more women are thriving in the workforce, they want a husband who has earning power but are not looking for him to be the sole provider.
More women want husbands with pleasing disposition. They may not want a man who is always moody. A man who is always cheerful is whom they desire.
Surprisingly, a man’s likes do not rank as high on women’s list of wants as it used to. Until recently, women are more willing to accept a man for who he his, despite the inevitable mood he may be.
Sociability from both men and women rank very high on their marriag material list. And for both sexes, it has been steadily moving up the list for many years. The rise of the “love marriage,” a partnership based on attraction rather than practicalities (like wealth or status) might mean that married couples are more likely to be friends and have mutual circles of friends.
A lot of couples want to associate with others and then socialise. Attending parties of other friends forms part of their marriage requirements.
Women have placed education and intelligence top making it one of their most desirable male traits for decades. This timeline coincides with more and more women receiving college education themselves. Once education becomes important in women’s lives, it is a more attractive trait in potential husbands.
Of course when a woman is educated, she is likely to go for an educated man. When they are gainfully employed, their income boost the family affairs faster.
Today, women are much more attracted to men who are interested in home and family than they ever have been. Men who have desire for their home and children is whom they desire.
After a days job, a man will come home to ensure that his children are comfortable. Because most women today are expecting to be in dual-earner relationships, they want husbands who will be happy and willing to contribute at home. More women today even report that they hope he will take the lead at home.
A woman wants a man who is emotionally stable and mature. Growing big physically is not the issue but maturity in the heart.
Men, too, place a heavy emphasis on a potential wife’s emotional maturity, signaling that it is a key quality for a stable partnership. Women seem to look past appearance to the heart of the matter.
A woman wants a man who is not easily provoked. Dependable character is what some women want in marriage.
Women want husbands that they can count on, and this has not changed in recent years. Yes, women look to their spouses to be lovers and friends, they also want them to be supportive and trustworthy. They want to know that their husbands will be there and remain loyal. Men, too, desire dependable character from their yet-to be wives.
Mutual attraction and love from the first appearance is what they want till they become old.
The highest-rated characteristic women seek from men is mutual attraction and love. Some no longer look for a man who will provide everything, afterall they are also educated and are gainfully employed, they want to be in love.
For some women, even when the man do not provide household needs, the love shown on her is enough. When women had no job prospects and needed to marry, they desired love . The women’s movement has not only helped women pursue careers, it has also given them more choice in love.

Continue Reading

Women

Echoes Of IWD : Need To Invest In Women

Published

on

As this year’s Internatinal Women’s Day (IWD) has come and gone, there are calls from different quarters on the need to invest in women so that we can achieve accelerated growth.
It was, indeed, a thing of joy when Rivers Women Unite For Sim, took delivery of large quantities of sanitary towels and some bags of rice provided them for this year’s celebration.
Many young women expressed joy that they got such gesture since some of them have financial problems getting sanitary towels whenever they are on.
Some secondary school students were also lucky to have a share of the benefits. They also got some sanitary towels.
The Rivers State Commissioner for Women Affairs organised a platform to celebrate and honour the women for the remarkable jobs they perform in their homes and society.
Addressing women on the occasion, the Hon. Commissioner for Women Affairs, Dr. Roseline Apawari Uranta, noted that women from time immemorial have been great pillars in achieving remarkable heights and stressed that IWD across the globe is pivotal all women for the roles they play in bringing, nurturing and sustaining life.
Dr. Uranta said that IWD, which started in 1911 and celebrated annually on March 8, is a global day that provides women a platform to address economic inclusion, participation in political and public life.
She said the day was set aside to look into lack of access to education for the girl-child, gender-based violence, child marriage, child trafficking, harmful cultural practices as well as other challenges facing women around the globe.
The Hon. Commissioner, who described March 8 as a day to celebrate the socio-economic, cultural and political achievements of women, emphasised that it is a day that offers women the opportunity to reflect on progressive achievements.
Noting that it is an opportunity to call for change, she stressed that it is also an opportunity to celebrate acts of courage and every achievement made by ordinary women who did extraordinary things and are remembered in history.
She noted that the IWD2024 theme:”Invest In Women, Accelerate Progress”, is timely and apt because according to her, to achieve gender equality, we must ensure that the rights, responsibilities and opportunities of women do not elude them.
Her words: ” We must see investing in women as a human right issue and consider investing in women as a social tool to eradicate poverty since women are helpmeet in the homes while a handful are breadwinners in their respective families”.
The commissioner urged women to uphold the deliberate act of investing in themselves, be it furthering formal education, developing a new skill as well as learning a trade.
“Shun idleness, always find something positive and productive to do, regardless of your age, social status and financial capabilities”, she said.
In a paper presentation, Dr. Dabota God’swill Jumbo, reiterated that investing in women would attract good and positive dividends to herself and the society at large and noted that it is essential in addressing poverty, hunger and climate change.
The guest speaker said women need more opportunities in elective and appointive positions, hence the need to encourage and support them in politics.
According to her, when you invest in women, they will be able to create safer environment devoid of gender-based violence.
In a goodwill message, the spokesperson, Rivers Women Unite For Sim, Mrs Charity Deemua appreciated the organisers for making it possible for women to gather and celebrate themselves.
She commended those who created a day like March 8 of every year to celebrate women and regretted that the girl-child was seen as a second-class person decades ago.
The former commissioner, Rivers State House of Assembly Commission, described those who taught it wise for women to celebrate as conquerors, tough and strong.
International Association of World Peace Advocates, a world-class organisation with the United Nations, honoured different categories of women.
In Cross River State, 150 women were empowered with about N15m to boost their small and medium scale businesses.
According to stakeholders, the women empowerment is vital in addressing social, economic and political challenges and will make them self-reliant.
An NGO, Association of Professional Women Engineering Technologists (APWET), said it’s aim is to promote professional excellence among engineering personnel, advocating for women and girl-child education.
With what we saw in terms of response to women’s call on issues affecting them from relevant authorities, we are optimistic that the women will do better whenever they are empowered.
If we must kick out cervical, breast and other forms of cancer in women, underage marriage, prostitution, we must invest in women.
There were goodwill messages from National Council for Women Societies (NCWS), International Federation of Female Lawyers (FIDA), Medical Women Association of Nigeria (MWAN), Nigeria Copyright Commission (NCC, Nigeria Association of Female Journalists (NAWOJ), among others.

By: Eunice Choko-Kayode

Continue Reading

Trending