A father is a member of
the male gender, designed by God as the source to enerate generations. He is one who God has given privilege to originate and institute life on earth. He is a progenitor, a nourisher, a supporter, a leader, an influencer and a founder.
The word “father” is derived from a Latin word “funtus” which means base or foundation.
Fathers are feathers God has given to the family and entire society to fly. Without Fathers you cannot go further. Fathers are spiritual ladders that we climb to see farther.
Fathers make us to gain supernatural speed.
When a father speaks into your life, the hand of God is brought to bear in your situation.
The blessings of a father can change an ugly situation. Your lifting is connected to a father.
It takes faithful fathers for a society to be better. A faithful father is the key to a responsible and meaningful society.
The greatest honour any man can have is to be called a father because “Father” is the title God gave to Himself. If God chose to refer to Himself as Father, it means that fathers have the greatest honour conferred on them. God has so much value for fathers; that is why, the first human creature that He made was a father (Adam). It was out of Adam that Eve was made; it could be said that Adam gave birth to Eve. We all came out of the loins of Adam (father)!
But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God. 1 Corinthians 11:3
The father is the one God has placed on earth to lay the foundation for the whole world. A father is the foundational entity upon which family and the society are built. If the society will succeed or fail, fathers have a key role to play. It is expedient that Fathers consider their roles in the society very importantly, as it has an inestimable value. Though, children love their mothers, but they follow their fathers.
This means that the legacy a father will leave for them determines how successful and far the children will go in life.
According to research in the United States, a father’s presence in the family will determine a child’s success and happiness.
It may be quite incredible but real that there are more prisoners who went to prison because their fathers were not there. Studies have shown that 43% of state prison inmates grew up with both parents, compared to 57% who grew up without their fathers or missing fathers. Studies also show that fatherlessness was the most prominent contributor to criminality and other social vices even more than poverty. It has led to ,the high employment of police corps and the building of more prisons in all parts of the world.
Responsibility is the thing people dread most yet it is one thing in the world that develops us.
The world is blessed mostly by men who do things not by those who merely talk about them. Without responsibility you will remain a liability.
But be ye doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving your own selves. James 1:22
Maturity does not only come with age, it comes with acceptance of responsibility. You are not just mature because you are old but because you accept responsibility. Fathers who punish children for wrong doing when they have not first taught them how to do right are themselves wrong. Fatherhood is not just a title to bear but a great honour from God coupled with great responsibilities; there is a price to pay.
The father is the head of the family. The father is the one who calls the shots in the family but he must also understand that calling the shots comes with performance of functions.
For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Ephesians 5:23
In this book, our major consideration is the father as the “head”.
We will also present our illustration using the human head. If you look at the humafl head, there are five distinctive things to note: the brain, the eyes, the ears, the mouth, and the nose.
The brain is for thinking. Therefore, every father must be a thinker. The eyes are for seeing (vision), so every father must be a visionary. The ears are for hearing thus, every father must be able to hear from God. The mouth is for speaking, hence, fathers must know how to talk maturely. The nose is for smelling; fathers must be sensitive.
These various sections will be discussed explicitly in subsequent chapters of this book.
A faithful father is the key to a responsible and meaningful society.
Fatherhood is not just a title to bear but a great honour from God which comes with great responsibilities.
A father is. a progenitor, a nourisher, a supporter, a leader, an influencer and a founder.
The Father As A Creative Thinker
The brain is for thinking and so every father must be a thinker.
How can a father use his brain? As you read further, secrets will be unveiled to you. A father is the brain behind family success or failure.
The first function of the human head is found in the brain. The brain has the ability to reason its way out of challenges.
According to an Austrian researcher, Dr Constantine Von Economo, the thickness of the brain is about three millimeters. However, when spread out it becomes as large as a page of newspaper. The brain consists of about fourteen billion cells; cells are designed to grow and multiply. Similarly, for the family to experience continuous growth, become a centre of attraction, and a reference point amongst other families, the father has to activate and reactivate the brain cells. The father has to be a think tank, he has to rack his brain and come out with life-saving solutions to the threatening challenges of his family.
Great fathers are always great thinkers. The family starts stinking when the father stops thinking. Without the use of the brain, no father will be able to make gain in life. The brain is the centre of thoughts, planning, strategising and management of affairs. It is the centre of knowledge, understanding and wisdom. A father should understand that he has the mind of Christ that must be put to use.
For who hath known the mind of the Lord, that he may instruct him? But we have the mind of Christ. 1 Corinthians 2: 16
Jesus, while on earth was never confused nor stranded when faced with challenges because, he did put his brain to use. He was faced with the challenge of insufficiency in the book of John chapter six but came out of it through positive thinking. As a father, you are not meant to be stranded. The father should use his brain to know what the family shtuld do and tackle the situation on ground per time..
Every great and faithful father will have to brain storm in order for his family to come out of every storm. He should be able to proffer solution that will bring hope to his family (especially his wife and children).
Many fathers are undermining their family success because they do not think. They have left the responsibility of thinking to their wives. The wives have their own responsibilities. As a father, do not’ let your wife do the thinking for you. Insult and insubordination will be on display in any family where the woman is the thinker while the man is the observer and the receiver.
Providing funds for the upkeep of the family does not excuse you from thinking! When such provision is devoid of thinking, confusion and tension become inevitable.
Providing money is not enough; you must be a thinker as a father.
Come now, and let us reason together, saith the LORD: though your sins be as scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they be red like crimson, they shall be as wool. Isaiah 1: 18
God refused to drop the mantle of deliverance on Jesus until He became mature at the age of thirty.
Fathers who are not thinkers do unscrupulous things in the guise of pleasing members of the family, and they end up regretting their decisions. Fathers must think before they act, not act before they think. By thinking, all faithful fathers foresee and forestall consequences of their actions.
A prudent man foreseeth the evil, and hideth himself: but the simple pass on, and are punished. Proverbs 22:3
A father must not preoccupy himself with frivolous and unprofitable thoughts. His thinking must be productive and channeled towards the advancement ofhis family vision.
Things A Father Should Think On:
Inculcate Godly values to his family to render faithful and acceptable service to God.
The father should think of how his family will become very deep in God and completely sold out to Him.
But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you. Matthew 6:33
If you look at men like my mentor, David Oyedepo, and another great man of God, Kenneth Copeland, these are men who gave their families a solid foundation, and caused them to be rooted in God.
The first thing a father should do is to make the family focus on God.
He will think of Godly values; inculcate them into his wife and children as a lifestyle, that they live-with even when he is no more.
Abraham was a typical example of this attribute. He infused into the life of his family godly values, and God was pleased with him.
Expand his knowledge base and develop his mind.
He should think of how to develop his mind by reading good books on family and marnage.
He should think of developing his knowledge base so as to be informed about current trends, and not to be possessed with outdated information.
Define family vision
He should also think of making short and long term plans for the family:
He should think of and determine the number of children he will have, considering his financial status and income.
He should think of the kind of schools his children should attend; preferably the ones which school fees he can afford to pay with ease. He should not succumb to the wife’s extravagance knowing that he has the responsibility to ensure that all resources needed for his children’s education are provided .
Place to live in
He should think of the kind of house or apartment he should build or lease. The father should be content with what he has per time.
General requirement for the upkeep of the home
He should determine the kind of things to be used to run the home at every given time. Pressure is an indication that you are living above your size.
The family starts’stinking when the father’stops thinking.
Fathers must think before they act, not act before they think.
The first thing a father should do is to make the family focus on God.
The Father: A Sensor Of Family Greatness (The Nose)
The nose is used for smelling; the father must possess high level of sensitivity, if the family must succeed. He (the father) discerns the state of things per time. A good father will smell his family as the smell of the field God has blessed. He should smell blessings.
And he came near, and kissed him: and he smelled the smell of his raiment, and blessed him, and said, See, the smell of my son is as the smell of a field which the LORD hath blessed: Genesis 27:27
Isaac did not smell curses on his son Jacob; he smelled blessings. A good and faithful father will not smell failure and mediocrity on his children because of their present circumstance or situation.
God being their Creator knows the potential He has deposited in them; do not look down on them. Your ability to smell greatness in them makes you a real and faithful father.
But when it pleased God, who separated me from my mother’s womb, and called me by his grace. Galatians 1: 15
Apostle Paul despite his arrogance and how he tormented the Christians, never knew who he was until he encountered Christ. It is almost certain that Paul far exceeded the expectations of people, even his father.
What we discern about our children is what they automatically and ultimately become. Let good things about your family be your greatest delight. Avoid smelling smallness, crisis, failure, divorce, etc. whatever you expect is what you get (Proverbs 23: 18). Smell pleasantness in the place of unpleasantness.
Do not lay down curses on your spouse and children for their misconduct. Do not predict evil for them.
For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the LORD, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end.
Jeremiah 29: 11
God’s thoughts for you are for good; let your thoughts for your family be for good.
How To Smell Greatness In Your Family
See them as God sees them
Look at each member of the family with the eye of scripture. See them the way God sees them.
Smell greatness from their potentials
Develop their potentials instead of tormenting them for their deficiencies.
Correct them with patience and politeness
Patiently correct them; believe that maturity and change may take time. If God is patient with you, you must be patient with your family.
Pray for them
… men ought always to pray, and not to faint;
Pray greatness into their lives and work at it until that greatness emerges.
Do not write them off
Do not write off any member of your family when God has not written them off.
See headship in them
Moreover the word of the LORD came unto me, saying, Jeremiah, what seest thou? And I said, I see a rod of an almond tree. Jeremiah 1: 11
Smell headship in them. consider them as being above their peers.
Reminisce on your past
Consider who you were before and how God patiently built you up to the level you are now. Consider the fact that if God made it happen for you He can also make it happen for your family members.
Remember the fact that those who are “manger” children today may become lords and kingdom attractions tomorrow, children of low status can become great.
Look at them as God’s perfect creatures
Remember that only the maker of a product can conclude that the product cannot be refurbished. No matter how badly damaged a product is, if the manufacturer says he can fix it, just believe and wait for him to fix it. God is Sale Manufacturer of mankind and there is nobody He cannot fix for good.
See their usefulness to you and society
Understand that everything created by G od is useful Even the waste from human beings is used as manure to grow crops.
It is what you perceive and believe that you receive about your family. Despite your child’s misbehaviour always look at what he or she carries on the inside.
Ibieyomie is the General Overseer of Salvation Ministries.