Child Sexual Abuse, Molestation

Child sexual abuse, also known as child molestation, is a form of child abuse in which an adult or older adolescent uses a child for sexual stimulation. This tends to happen a lot to younger kids. Forms of child sexual abuse include engaging in sexual activities with a child (whether by asking or pressuring, or by other means), indecent exposure of the genitals, female nipples, etc, and child sexual exploitation, including using a child to produce child pornography.
Child sexual abuse can occur in a variety of setting, including home, school, work, etc. That is why it is more advisable for parents not to leave their younger ones with any adult (especially the opposite sex) be it your brother, neighbour, family friend or uncle. The girls are mostly the victims of this child sexual abuse. I’m not saying some boys don’t get molested because as a matter of fact, boys get molested too. But the rate of girls being molested is more. Also, teens should learn to dress decently to avoid certain things. Because, the way you dress is the way you’re addressed.
It is advisable for parents to also keep close eyes on their kids because sometimes, the kids get scared to talk or they do not know how to tell you. I stumbled across a lady’s post once on facebook, this lady has a five- year- old son who was in primary school. Each time she was bathing with the child, the child always had erection and also tried to touch her bare body. As usual, she would scold him and he’ll apologise. It didn’t stop, it kept on happening anytime they bathed together and she couldn’t bear it again so she told her husband and her husband just laughed it off, saying he’s a growing child. Not until one day, she sat him down and asked him few questions and then he confessed that he was being molested by his teacher. Sex at a very young age! And she threatened to kill him if he tells anyone that was why he said nothing. So what am I saying? Observe your kids, be free with them so that they can open up to you.
Child sexual abuse covers a range of illegal sexual activities, including; possessing images of child sexual abuse, forcing a child to strip naked or masturbate, engaging in any kind of sexual activity in front of a child, including watching pornography. Taking, downloading, viewing or distributing sexual images of children, encouraging a child to perform sexual acts in front of a webcam, not taking measures to protect a child from witnessing sexual activity or images. Inappropriate sexual touching of a child, whether clothed or unclothed, penetrative sex, etc.
Some children often do not talk about sexual abuse because they think it is their fault or they have been convinced by their abuser that it is normal or a “special secret”. Children may also be bribed or threatened by their abuser, or told they will not be believed. There are some signs you may notice when a child is sexually abused. The signs are; Changes in behaviour – a child may start being aggressive, withdrawn, clingy, have difficulties sleeping, have regular nightmares or start wetting the bed. Avoiding the abuser – the child may dislike or seem afraid of a particular person and tries to avoid spending time alone with them. Physical problems – the child may develop health problems, including soreness in the genital and anal areas or sexually transmitted infections or they may become pregnant. Problems at school – an abused child may have difficulty concentrating and learning, and their grades may start to drop. Giving clues – Children may also drop hints and clues that the abuse is happening without revealing it outright. It is just left for you as a parent to sit and observe.
Sexual abuse can cause serious physical and emotional harm to children both in short term and the long term. In the short term, children may suffer health issues, such as sexually transmitted infections, physical injuries and unwanted pregnancies. In the long term, people who gave been sexually abused are more likely to suffer with depression, anxiety, eating disorders, and Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). They’re also more likely to self-harm, become involved in criminal behaviour, misuse drugs and alcohol, and to commit suicide as young adults.
So please, as a parent, you can prevent all these from happening, like they say, prevention is better than cure. Do not leave the child with bigger opposite sex, observe your child and most of all, build a strong parental relationship with your child so that he/she will be free to tell you things. As a teenager too, it’s not your fault if you’ve been sexually abused. You can stop it from repeating itself. Learn to speak up with fear. Also, parents should take children for examination from time to time. Like I also said, the way you dress, is the way you are addressed. So teens should also dress decently to avoid lustful looks from older men.
Akwu writes from Port Harcourt.

By: Cherie Akwu