How Committed Are You In Relationships ?

Lydia and Dominic were married for eight years but for these eight years, Lydia was never appreciated by Dominic. It was eight years she found herself begging for Dominic attention, love and companionship which never got to her.

She was quite sweet, kind understanding and rich and her husband and guy (as she calls him), Dominic, enjoyed from the largeness of her heart. But, he neither appreciated her, nor was he reciprocative of her loving and caring gestures until she quitted the relationship.

How unseemingly yet enduring it sounds. That’s the predicament of most wives and ladies in their marriages and relationships.

A lot of women are sweet, sexual, affectionate and with very big hearts. Sounds good of a typical well-bred lady or woman. When your’re a woman with such heart, you tend to give love all day long to everyone around you and particularly your spouse.

On the downside, if you are not careful, there’s nothing left of you at the end of the day. That means we not only need to refuel but we also need to receive love and affection from those we love. Of course, this can’t be one-sided show. Unfortunately recent development is making it feel that way for reasons that don’t hold water.

Woman are supposed to be strong, love and take good care of themselves. And we are. But if you are also an affectionate, sexual woman there’s an empty place in your life that can’t be filled by anything else than the affection of the man you love. This is true but sometimes, it doesn’t work out that way.

Glaringly, some men tend to take such sweet, loving, affectionate women for granted.

These women who are strong, always there when needed, forgiving, compassionate, positive and always in good moods are most times left behind. Somehow, they end up last place on their men’s daily list of priorities, that is, they receive little or no attention in return of their beautiful and attractive attributes.

There are lots of women who are terribly lonely in their relationships in spite of their make-up and it pricks the heart why such women should receive less of what they offer from their sponses.

Men, although would always have some reasons for not giving their women the ‘love’, the affection and time they deserve and desire from them every day.

They said the economy is tight and demanding. “We need to go out and fend for the women. For this reasons, we can be out for days, weeks and even months and we expect them to understand with us and accept us the way we are”.

But, there is more to it. The women argued. “It’s not just about not being home for these periods but even when they are around, what do they offer you. Sometimes, their being around is as better as not being around, that’s it”. And I wonder, is it suggestive of having more of callous men around?

Ladies and even wives deserve better treatment. They deserve to be recognised for what they are: a Treasure. They  deserve men who would put them first on their list of priorities no matter what. And I say, it doesn’t matter how busy or crazy his life is. If he truly loves you, he will make room for you everyday. Not just ten minutes of the time but all the time you need from him. Why? Because believes and values you.

Unfortunately, the quest for companionship and marriage among ladies have pushed them to setting with guys and husbands less than what they deserve. This shouldn’t be so. As a woman that you are, you can find the time in your stressful multi-tasking life for your man-to look for him, wash his clothes, give him his sexual rights and all other very tasking demands, he should be able to do same for you if he says he loves you.

It is worthwhile putting in everything to make a relationship work but if it doesn’t, don’t give up on yourself. Don’t settle for the less either. Because, when this happens, it gives you that sense of being a failure. But you’re not. The truth is it takes two to make a relationship work. If he isn’t willing to put in the time and effort required of him, you definitely can’t do this for him and when you do, sure you’re the enduring type.

Moreover, never doubt there are men who will treasure you and spoil you with all the love and affection you deserve everyday. If you’re single, you’ve got to get out of your enclosed and supposedly failed shell out fare so they can find. Or maybe, he’s been in your life for a while, quietly waiting for you to recognise him.

Sometimes, the man of your dreams is someone you already know and at other times, he is just there needing to get a clue. Whatever, it all starts with you. When you stop setting for less than you deserve, everything changes and become especially, your love life becomes what it should be for you.

Sylvia ThankGod-Amadi